Pretty Little Fears
by wild thoughts
Summary: An epiphany changes everything.
1. Author's Note!

**So this is something that I've been working on as a way to draw inspiration to get back into writing mode.**

I** know updates on my other stories have been scarce but while writing this one I would definitely say that it gave me a little bit of a boost.**

I** hope you guys enjoy this story - it's based on an article that I've read. I have no experience with the basis of this plot (I can't relate) but I tried to make it somewhat believable (or so I think). All my inspiration came from that piece which I read.**

**Even**** though I couldn't relate, I actually enjoyed writing this.**

**Please**** let me know what you think.**

**This**** story is not finished because I couldn't think of a definite way to round it off, so please feel free to leave a review; maybe that'll help me to decide on how to take things further or if I should just not continue with it and leave it as it is.**** Thanks.**


	2. chapter 1

On a warm summer's evening as Olivia left her apartment and made her way to her car she received a phone call.

"Hey Abby." She greeted casually as she got in behind the wheel.

"Liv hey, join Quinn and I for cocktails at Rocco's."

"Tonight?"

"Uh-huh."

"Wait, I thought that you were going to be spending the evening at your sister's place?"

"I was but plans changed due to some emergency at her work."

"Oh I see but anyhow, about tonight, unfortunately I won't be able to join you guys. I already have plans. I'm actually in the car right now about leave."

"Seriously? Liv come on!"

"Sorry Abby, I promise I'll make it up to you though."

"He's back in town isn't he?"

"Yes and although you're the greatest friend a girl can have, I've missed my other best friend."

"See this is why you can't have two best friends because now I feel like he's stealing you away from me and I want to hate him for that."

"He's not. But c'mon Abbs, he's been gone for almost a month."

"Right, so shouldn't he be spending some time reuniting with his boo instead of hanging out with you? ...No offense."

"She'll probably be joining us." Liv shrugged as if Abby could she her.

"Whatever, just tell him that next time I want to spend time with my Liv he better back down."

"I will give him the message. You girls have fun okay?"

"Sure. You too."

"Bye Abby."

"G'bye Liv."

Some time later Olivia scanned the room as she walked into Monroe's, a hot spot pub and grill.

A wide smile took over her face when she finally spotted him.

He stood up with a smile matching hers as he waited for her to reach their table.

Liv took a short jog towards the table and threw her arms around him.

After a lengthy hug he pulled out her chair as they got seated.

"You seem extremely happy to see me. Almost as if I'm your only friend." He smirked after the humourous remark.

"Hey! I've missed you, okay."

"I wasn't even away for that long and it's not like we didn't text or call each other while I was away."

"Fitzgerald Thomas Grant are you saying you didn't miss me? Not even a little bit?" Liv asked playfully, squinting her eyes.

"Wellll.."

"You're such an asshole."

The annoyed frown on her face made him laugh. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Of course I've missed you Livvie. How was things here during my absence?"

"Nothing exciting happened. And, how was Colorado? Did you enjoy getting to spend a few days with your family?"

"Colorado was good and yeah, being home was nice. My mom was super sad when I left. Imagine that, I'm a grown 35 year old man and she still treats me like I'm 13 sometimes." He chortled.

"Hey you're still her baby no matter how old and ugly you are."

"Ugly??"

"Okay maybe not ugly but you get what I'm saying. Did you order yet because I'm starving."

"No I was waiting for you to get here. We both know you're not the most punctual person in the world." He replied and received a glare from Liv.

"I'm literally always on time. You on the other hand. ." She commented.

While scanning through the open menu in her hands Olivia peered over at Fitz. "How's Leah? Will she be joining us later on?"

"She's fine and no, it's just us tonight." He answered quick and short.

"Oh.. Is everything okay with you guys?"

"Yeah of course everything's fine it's just.." He paused to release a deep sigh. "She knew that I was coming back today and I expected us to spend some quality time together and get re-acquinted but instead she ran off to Las Vegas with her sister to shoot an ad for their new make-up line."

"Your girl is a model and that includes lots of traveling. This is not new information. You knew her schedule would be unpredictable."

"I know but the whole planning and scheduling to see each other is getting exhausting."

"That's on you. She's young and her career is just taking off, you either stick it out or put an end to the relationship."

"This is why it's just easier to keep things light and simple and not putting a label on it."

Liv snorted laughter. "That's sad."

"Livvie you know me. You know the whole marriage and kids thing isn't such a want for me. I mean yes of course I wanna find someone great and really fall in love and spend forever with her but I just don't believe in marriage. Marriage just brings nasty arguments, complications and unnecessary drama that didn't even exist before. I just want to be happy and content with my life. Do you really need a piece of paper to show someone how much you love them?"

"Not believing in marriage and not wanting to have kids are two way different things wouldn't you say?"

Fitz just shrugged his shoulders. "Not really. Don't people get married to then start a family and have the perfect life or whatever?"

"Okay let's just agree that not everyone wants the same things in life. Now enough about that, why don't you tell me more about your time in Colorado and being with your fam."

_Fitz's family were in the transport and logistics business. His grandfather started it back in the day with one truck. It was a small but efficient business. Today it's one of the most reliable transportation services around the U.S._

_They expanded gradually and six years ago Fitz was put in charge of managing the offices and warehouse in Philadelphia._

_His move to Philly and being shown around by a friend was how he met Olivia. His friend used to date one of Liv's friends and so they ended up moving in the same circle._

_The two of them just hit it off from the get-go._

_Everyone found it extremely odd that two people could get along so quick and easily._ _For outsiders their chemistry was undeniably fierce._

_...And even though they find a safe space in each other __and just complement each other on every level, they're relationship was nothing more than platonic._

"What's there to tell? I was at head office most of the time talking shop. We're working on a few new things which will hopefully get us a couple of big contracts and we're expanding our learnership programmes."

"So business is good."

The waitress approached their table with a pleasant smile. "You two ready to order?"

"Yes."

When the food arrived Olivia almost cheered at the sight. Her mouth was watering.

"You didn't tell me about your family though."

"Everyone's doing really good. Mom and Dad are happy and healthy. Oh and big news, my little brother finally grew some balls and bought an engagement ring for Laura."

"Darin is proposing!?"

"Yup." Fitz chuckled as he chewed his food.

"That is major! They've been together since high school, right?"

"Yes, high school sweethearts. That idiot should thank his lucky stars that Laura was so patient with him. It only took him eleven years to pop the question."

"Shut up, they're cute. I'm so happy for them."

"Yeah I bet mom and dad will be over the moon once they find out."

"Of course they will."

"Enough about that, how's things going between you and Logan?"

"You know damn well things aren't exactly 'going' anymore."

"Hey last time we talked about Logan you told me the two of you were going to try and work through your issues."

"Yeah no that didn't work because apparently it was more _my _issues than _our_ issues."

"Logan said that?"

"Right to my face." Liv perched her lips into a half sad smile. "It's true though."

"Stop. You're not gonna sit here and blame yourself. I won't allow it."

"Then let's not talk about Logan anymore. Did you know that I could've went for cocktails with the girls but instead I chose to spend my evening with you? So you better make it worth it."

"Okay Pope. I'll order us a round of drinks, how about that?"

"Sounds good to me."

"You know if you want you could still meet up with your friends..?"

"No it's fine. I don't mind putting up with you for the rest of the night."

"How was your classes today?"

_At the age of 27 Olivia was the proud owner of 'Bright Stars' a little dance studio for kids of all ages, toddlers to teenagers. Along with herself she had two other instructors working for her; Harrison and Quinn._

_Olivia herself has been dancing since the age of six. Although it wasn't until high school that she began taking her dancing more seriously when she realized that it could turn into a career for her, and since then she never looked back._

_Olivia__ attended the Philadelphia university of the arts where she majored in dance. After that she got signed up by a prominent performing arts company which took her on so many learning experiences all over the world._

_Olivia loved it with all her heart. Performing was her escape - especially when her mother died - but soon after she decided that she wanted to slow down and be there for her father even though he pushed her to continue with her dancing._

_Hence the dance studio. She wasn't planning on quitting dancing altogether. Another thing that influenced her decision was her long term life goal; she wanted to settle down and have a family._

"Just like every other day, a complete blast."

"Nice!"

After finishing their food and sitting in silence for a few minutes Fitz was the one to break the silence.

"You're good though right Livvie?" His voice was genuine and sincere and it almost made Olivia a little emotional.

"I'm good Fitz, seriously, don't worry about me."

He knew she was going through a challenging time with the breakup but also that she didn't want to address it.

"I'm here for you. Always and no matter what. I got you Liv."

"Thanks. That means a lot to me. You know.. I've been missing my mom a lot more lately."

"Mother's have a way of making everything better. And your mom was a lovely woman. I'm glad I had the chance to meet her. She was so soft-spoken and good-hearted."

The two friends share a tender smile.

When they finally capped off an enjoyable evening Fitz lead her outside to the parking lot.

"Get over here you." He pulled Olivia into his large frame and wrapped his arms securely around her as they stood outside by her car.

"I had fun tonight." She spoke into his shirt.

"Yeah me too."

Olivia tipped her head back to look into his face. "Next time will you let me pay for my own meal?"

"Not a chance ma'am." Fitz replied and Liv chuckled.

"Your girlfriend might think that I'm after your money."

"But we know better don't we?"

"Stop trying to be smart you fool." She laughed and stepped out of his embrace.

"Get home safe Miss Pope."

"You too. Goodnight Fitz."

"Night Livvie."

He watched until her car was down the road before he got into his own car and headed home.

Two days later Fitz showed up at Liv's apartment after work.

"Hey, did you cook?"

"No she didn't so you can turn right around and leave. Go to bed hungry for all I care." Abby answered from the couch. She wasn't serious, she just loved going back and forth with him.

Fitz strolled over to her. "Shit Abby, who ruined your day? Lighten up."

"Shut up."

"Awww.." He mocked her.

Meanwhile Olivia was in the kitchen heating up the food which she had kept for Fitz.

She always made extra because he'll swing by unexpectedly and be starving.

"Here you go." She handed him the plate.

"Ohhh man I love you. Thanks Livvie."

Liv took a seat next to Abby, folding her feet underneath her. "You're welcome."

"You're spoiling him Liv, that shit needs to stop."

"I spoil all my friends." Olivia replied, mindlessly running her fingers through her hair.

"Well your friend over here has a girlfriend who can spoil him. Oh wait, can she even cook?"

"Abby c'mon, don't be mean."

Laughingly Abby turned to Fitz, "You gotta stop dating these young chicks man. One of these days you won't be able to keep up with them."

"They're not even that young and I'm definitely not that old." He responded.

"Sure, whatever you say. Hey, I've been wondering..is bae cool with your friendship with Liv?"

"Uhh okay that's..random." Fitz said looking at her with a confused expression. "But to answer you, yes she is. Why?"

"Are you sure? 'Cause I know you guys have been together for a few months now, that's longer than all your past relationships combined.." Abby joked then went on, "..No but seriously though Fitz, no woman wants their man to have a girl best friend. That's a big problem in a relationship. In fact, we don't even want any woman within inches of our man."

Olivia waved her hand in the air drawing their attention to her. "Hellooo I'm an openly lesbian women. I doubt Leah is worried about me being around Fitz."

"Gay or not Liv, any girl would be alert if her man had a beautiful hot babe like yourself as a bestie. Leah might feel a little threatened but doesn't want to say it out loud." Abby said.

"Okay _'Team Leah_'." Olivia mocked. "Trust me, there's no need for her to feel any type of way. Besides, men are gross, complicated, and they behave like a bunch of animals. Not my cup of tea."

Fitz let out a hearty laugh. "See? It's all good. Liv's my best friend and if a girl that I'm with can't accept our friendship, well then that's too bad."

"You're saying you'd choose your friendship with Liv over a girl?"

"Hundred percent."

"But what if it's the perfect girl and she's everything you've ever wanted in a woman?"

"If she was the perfect girl for me then she would be okay with Olivia. Besides, Liv's awesome, who wouldn't like her?"

"Okay lowkey; you two would've made a great couple, just so you know." Abby stated light-heartedly.

Liv gave Abby an amused glance. "Because we're best friends?"

"Just..your whole bond. You guys get each other and you share this amazing connection. Oh! And Fitz treats you better than he treats his own girlfriend."

"Eh, he's okay I guess. Also, you thinking of us as a couple is super weird."

"Ah well, maybe in another lifetime. Hey by the way, with everything that happened between you and Logan, do you think you'd still wanna go ahead with..you know--"

"I still wanna do it. Maybe not really soon but in the next year or so yeah, definitely."

"On your own?"

"Well Logan left so, yeah. She just wasn't ready for that kind of commitment."

"She seemed super eager at first."

"Having kids was always a dream of mine though. It's something I wanted and she just went along and for that I don't blame her. We were together for about three years and now looking back I feel like what we had was a foolish romance. I think we moved too quick. Our relationship became super serious, super fast, so it explains why she thought she was up for taking such a big step with me. Plus I think that maybe I got a little carried away. I'm not ready for a child at this particular moment in time. I should've thought it through. I was just a little over eager and overly excited with the idea of having a baby with Logan by my side thinking she's the one. Apart from everything that has happened, she really is a great girl with a good heart. And we had the best time together. It's a shame we didn't pace ourselves. But I'm not heartbroken, I'm actually quite happy that our paths had crossed."

"Yeah you're right, she was a very nice and kind person. A good partner for you. I just-- If you _are_ planning on having a baby..on your own-- This whole process could be one hell of an emotional journey Liv. You might not get success on your first try and every other try after that is gonna cost you more and more money. I know you're up for it but it could be a long and frustrating road ahead."

"You're right and that's why I'm being thorough with my research and trying to find the best clinic. Be a little positive Abby."

"I just don't want you to rush this."

"I'm not. It's not like I'm planning on doing it in the next month."

"Did you say anything about it to your dad?"

"I did." Olivia chuckled, "He thinks I should just adopt."

"It's not the worst idea."

"Let me just give the insemination a go."

"Okay. And please don't think I'm against your decision, by all means you have my full support. It's just, you're my friend and your happiness and well being is important to me."

"Thank you Abby, really, that means so much. I love you."

"I love you too. Just one thing; if your future baby is a girl, 'Abby' should be on top of the list of baby names."

Fitz got up. "The food was really amazing Liv, thanks. I'm just gonna go clean this up."

"You're welcome. Hey bring me my popcorn when you're done." Liv hollered after him.

Once Abby heard the water running in the kitchen she turned to Liv. "Fitz was awfully quiet just now.."

"You know guys don't like to talk about stuff like that." Olivia answered.

Fitz walked in carrying the bag of popcorn and held it out in front of Liv. "You're sharing right?"

"Uh no, you just ate." She attempted to snatch the bag but he pulled it back.

"So? I still want some popcorn."

Abby laughed and got up. "I don't have time for another silly argument between you guys and it's getting late so I'm gonna head home."

"Wait I'll walk you out." Liv said hopping out of her seat.

"Bye Whelan." Fitz called out.

"Bye Fitzgerald."

When Liv returned from saying goodbye to Abby she found Fitz in front of the tv, munching away on her snack.

"You're kidding me right?"

He looked up at her with pure innocence. "What?"

"Please hand over my popcorn."

"Fine."

Liv ruffled his hair as she plopped down next to him. "Good boy."

"What are you cooking tomorrow?"

"You literally just ate and you're already thinking about your next meal. How about you start using those big ass hands of yours and learn how to cook?"

"I distinctively remember asking you to teach me how to put some simple meals together but you refused."

"Liar. I didn't refuse. I just didn't have time and neither do you. You're running a company and you've got a girlfriend. You don't have time for cooking lessons."

"I'll make time. When can we start then?"

"I'll let you know but we're doing it at your place."

"Why?"

"I'm not taking the risk of you possibly burning down my kitchen."

"Oh come on I'm sure it won't be that bad. I can use a stove."

"Your place. Deal or no deal." Liv replied with conviction.

"Fine. Deal."

They shifted their focus to the tv screen as they shared the bag of popcorn.

After a few minutes Olivia leaned into his side and Fitz draped his arm around her while his head unconsciously rested on top of hers.

"When are you going home?" Her voice was low and content, showing signs of tiredness.

"Are you kicking me out?"

"No but I wanna go to bed soon. I had a long day."

He stayed silent for a minute.

"Hey Liv?"

"M'yeah?"

"Are you sure about..you know.. having a baby?"

"I am."

"It's a lot."

"I'm not getting younger Fitz. With insemination..hell even a normal pregnancy your age plays a big role."

"You're only 27 though."

"But I get older every year and in a year and half, or maybe two years, I want to be able to carry a child without complications. Look Fitz you have your life goals and I have mine and obviously it's way different. I want this. I want someone to live for and to love, unapologetically."

"I get it.."

"Don't you think I'm ready for this, to be a mom?"

"Actually I think you'll make a wonderful mom Olivia. You've got so much love to give. . that is going to be one happy child."

"So I have your support?" She asked as they're focus remained on the tv screen.

"You do."

Olivia sat up and looked Fitz in the eye. "Thank you. Having a friend like you along the way will certainly make everything a lot easier."

"You can always rely on me Livvie, you know that."

With a heartfelt smile she leaned in to give him a hug. "I love you Grant."

"I love you more, no backsies."

Olivia shook with laughter. "Jeez what are you, a ten year old girl?"

"Shut up."

Minutes later Liv went to see Fitz off at the door.

"Shrimp linguine."

"What?"

"Tomorrow night's dinner."

Fitz grinned. "You can bet that I'll be here."

"Of course. Goodnight Grant."

"Goodnight Liv, see you tomorrow."


	3. chapter 2

_2 months later. ._

"Men are trash."

Olivia, Quinn and Harrison each gave Abby a questioning look after her abrupt statement.

Liv invited them all out for drinks and these kinda nights usually ended in great fun.

"What? It's true isn't it?" Abby asked while finishing her second cocktail of the night.

Harrison perked up in defense when Olivia and Quinn silently agreed.

"So just because you don't know how to pick the right guy, all men are trash?" He asked.

Abby was ready for a fight. "The fact that you really gotta go on a hunt for just one good guy proves my point. In general, men are just assholes who think they can do whatever the hell they want and treat women however they please because they're men and in their crazy little world that means they're more superior than us women. Honestly, it's disgusting."

"Don't you see how hard you're making it for us if you're going around with that notion of all men being the same? Yeah there's some real scumbags out there but there's also real men in this world who wants nothing more than to uplift women and to let them know that we appreciate them."

"How many of those men do you know Harrison because I don't know a single one of 'em." Abby hit back.

"Abby.. Just stop saying that all men are trash when you know that's not true."

A light chuckle could be heard from Olivia and Quinn.

"Aww you're hurting his manly feelings Abby." Liv joked.

"Girls, tell this man that he's fighting a losing battle."

"You've both made some valid points." Liv shrugged then continued, "And on some points I can agree with both of you but that doesn't change the fact that there are more shitty men than good guys in this world. It's kind of unfortunate actually."

Harrison swirled his glass of whiskey with a sigh. "Everything must be working out great for you then since you're not even into guys. Because women are soo unproblematic." He said in a mocking voice while rolling his eyes.

"Really Harrison you're gonna bring my sexuality into this? You actually think that because I'm gay that I haven't been on the receiving end of a sexist, misogynist pig who thinks nothing of women? Fucking hell have you ever felt your chest tighten up from worry just by having to walk past a group of men who thinks being inappropriate and calling you all kinds of names is just harmless fun?"

Harrison immediately felt nothing but regret at his comment. "Look, Liv I shouldn't have said that. I took it a too far and I'm sorry, I really am so genuinely sorry."

"Well you went there and maybe you do regret saying it out loud but hey, at least you got it off your chest right? Shit if you rate yourself as one of the good guys then let your actions speak for itself and teach the next guy to be more gentle and kind. My god, why don't you walk in the shoes of a woman for just one day and see how much we get judged, mistreated and disrespected by other men."

Abby looked around the table at everyone. "I should apologize for starting this whole.. discussion, and letting it get out of hand. I'm sorry. We all came here tonight to have a good time.. Please, let's just do that."

"Harrison why don't you go and see what they have in the buffet area and maybe put something together for us." Quinn suggested, knowing everyone needed a little breather before things got out of hand.

"Sure."

**xxx**

Monday came and it was back to work.

"Hey Liv?" Harrison jogged after Olivia, catching up with her as she entered her office.

"Yeah?"

"Are you still mad at me?"

"You've been blowing up my phone all weekend with apologies Harrison. How many times do I have to say that we're okay, that you're forgiven?"

"I-- Are you really okay? It's just-- I keep on replaying that conversation over and over in my head and what I said to you was totally uncalled for. And honestly it just proved Abby's point."

"Seriously stop, breathe, and move on." She laughed. And he joined in.

"Okay."

"Hey by the way can you make room for a thirty minute session just after 4p.m this afternoon?"

"I guess so yeah. We have a new group coming in?"

"No just a worried bride who swears her fiancè has two left feet and she wants the perfect wedding so we've gotta choreograph their wedding dance and make him look good."

"Ooh my favorite type of clients." Harrison said jokingly.

"I would've suggested that we prepare something beforehand for their session but I'm thinking that maybe we should wait and see what falls into their comfort zone. I don't want them to stress about a dance on their special day."

"Yeah you're probably right. Anyway, I gotta bounce. I've got to get the music ready for my next group."

Olivia's day ended at around 6:30pm. She drove home listening to a playlist of Leon Bridges' music which always made her unwind and calm down. She sang along. Thoroughly enjoying the drive home.

Her phone beeped just as she stopped at a red light.

A text from Fitz; **_"Cooking lesson for tonight still on?"_**

Her feet and legs felt tired from the day's activities but she couldn't cancel. Their cooking lessons were taking shape and he was just starting to get the hang of things.

**_"Yep. 7:30 as usual."_**

Olivia switched lanes to begin her timing drive to Fitzgerald Grant's house.

A stop at the gas station and pulling over to answer Abby's phonecall had her at Fitz's place exactly on time.

"Hey tiny dancer, come on in."

Olivia returned his smile as she walked into his arms for a quick, friendly hug. "How was your day?"

"Not too busy. Yours?"

"It was a good day with the exception of Harrison practically crawling after me to forgive him."

They headed straight to the kitchen. "You two had an argument?"

"Somewhat. Wanna try making the Chicken Piccata? I thought we could do something light tonight."

Fitz leaned against the counter as Liv washed her hands. "Something that happened at work? Chicken Piccata sounds fine. I guess I'll just have to wait a little longer to try your casserole recipe."

"No, outside of work. It's really not important." She turned to face him. "I know I said we'll try the casserole today but--"

"It's okay. And are you sure you don't want to talk to me about your argument with Harrison?"

The two of them fell into routine. Getting the ingredients out and prepping for their cooking. Well, Fitz's cooking.

"To summarize; we went out Friday night. Abby had an opinion about men, and Harrison strongly disagreed. I also had my own opinion and so Harrison figured that since I'm gay I don't get to have an opinion. I set him straight and he felt bad for saying what he said." Liv smiled up at Fitz who wasn't smiling at all. "There. Now you're all caught up on _that_ story."

"He actually said that to you? He's got some nerve."

"Not as directly as that but yeah.. He implied it by saying I'm not even into guys."

"You're his boss. Does he know that you can make him unemployed in a matter of seconds."

"Grant, relax. I'm over it. He was being emotional and passionate, and he really did feel bad for what he said. Yes he works for me but he's also my friend. And friends have disagreements. They say things in the heat of the moment. It happens."

"Still, he's an ass for coming at you like that."

"Let's get cooking, okay?"

"Alright."

Olivia hopped on the counter. Fitz offered her, her favorite snack; popcorn. And they start a light conversation in between Liv throwing instructions at Fitz.

"Ooh that smells so nice. Way to go Grant."

Fitz chuckled and wiped his hands on his apron, "Hey you still gotta taste it so ease up on the compliments."

"Your last two meals were very good though so I'm not worried."

"It helps having a great teacher."

"Let's just say we make a great team then."

"Indeed. Wanna help me set the table?"

"Sure."

On the first bite Olivia was impressed. The chicken piccata turned out really well. Not perfect, but neither one of them can call themselves a top chef so, who cares.

"Guess what?" Fitz said with a hint of laughter in his voice.

"What?"

"Leah texted me yesterday out of the blue."

With a confused frown Liv replied, "You've been over for a month now."

"I know." He laughed.

"So what did she had say?"

"Asked me if I wanted to grab a drink or something which of course I declined."

"Why?" Liv asked, placing a piece of the creamy chicken in her mouth.

"Why did I decline?"

"Yes, why?"

"Uh, because I don't go for drinks with exes."

"But you two didn't have a bad break-up. Maybe it would've been harmless. Just two friends hanging out?"

"Really? Okay first of all, we're _not_ friends. Livvie c'mon you know she would've expected something else. I'm not that cruel to use her just to throw her to the side again. That's not cool."

"Aw I'm proud of you. You did the right thing."

"Darin's wedding is next weekend. You're going with me, right?"

"You just assume I'm going?"

"Well no but why not? Come on it'll be fun."

"You're the best man, what am I supposed to do there if you're gonna be occupied with your best man duties. I don't really know anyone except your parents who will also have their complete focus on the wedding and everything that goes with it."

"Livvie please..I don't want to go alone. Plus you could do with a little break from work and this place."

"I don't even have anything to wear to a wedding. Come to think of it; what kind of wedding are they having? Like, is there a theme? A specific dress code?"

"An outdoor wedding at Daisies Estate. And no, they didn't specify a dress code."

"Wait why didn't you give him a bachelor's party?"

"I couldn't find time for that. Unfortunately I had a lot of important meetings lined up these past two weeks which I just simply couldn't postpone. He did seem to have a good time though because they had a joint affair. One big bachelor's and bachelorette party."

"Maybe that's a good thing because you would've dragged him into places he ain't never seen before." She joked.

"Oh that's what you think of me?"

"You took Abby and I to a strip club once in case you've forgotten."

"Only because of Abby's curiosity. And we didn't even stay long, plus I don't remember neither of you complaining at the time. Anyway, the wedding.. Will you go with me? Mom will be delighted to see you, you know."

With a hearty laugh Olivia pointed an accusatory finger at Fitz. "Don't you use your mother on me Grant."

He laughed along, "Just say yes Livvie."

"Okay fine, I'll go. Maybe I'll be lucky enough to even catch the bouquet."

"Be careful what you wish for. By the way how's your dad doing?"

"He's doing pretty great. Ever since he started that reading program at the library he's been in good spirits."

"It's really cool what he's doing, helping young underprivileged kids to read and not just that but to help them to understand what they're reading. And doing it for free? He's such an awesome guy."

"Yeah, I told him he should've been a teacher because I've seen him in action and he's doing a proper job with those kids. But he's just such a lover of literature, he can literally make the words come alive when reading a book. I remember being a kid and story time with my dad would always be the most exciting part of my day."

"That's amazing."

"I want him to find someone though. I mean I know mom was his true love but still, I don't like seeing him so alone. She's been gone for five years now and yes we both still miss her every day but I want him to move on and find someone that'll make him happy again."

"Have you told him this?"

"It has come up a few times yes."

"And? How does he feel about it?"

"He says he's too old to be looking for love and that I'm the only and most important woman in his life. Why don't you talk to him?"

"Me??" Fitz asked with a surprised chuckle. "I don't think that's a good idea Liv. Look, don't force it. Who knows, maybe he'll meet a nice lady at the library."

"Yea you're probably right. ."

Fitz smirked. "I'm always right."

"Ha! You wish."

The two of them stayed and chatted for a little while longer before Liv eventually decided to head home.


	4. chapter 3

Fitz and Olivia arrived safe and sound in Denver, Colorado late Thursday afternoon for his brother's wedding.

Since Fitz was the bestman he had to be there for all the pre-wedding stuff hence their early arrival.

Margaret Grant insisted on Liv staying at their family home for the duration of the weekend.

"Hey. You're already dressed? It's not even eight a.m yet Liv."

"You know I'm usually up early Grant. Coffee?"

"Sure."

Fitz accepted the cup with a silly smile.

"What?" Liv asked with her eyebrows raised.

"I don't know..just-- I like that you're not unfamiliar in this house."

"Your parents instantly made me feel welcomed and at home, so you've got them to thank for that."

"We're going to the pre-wedding brunch later on."

"_We?_ I'm pretty sure I'm just here for the wedding."

"Yes we. You're my date this weekend." He chuckled and winked at her.

"You're a funny man Fitzgerald Grant. And as your date, what is expected of me?"

"I go nowhere without you but most importantly I just want you to have fun. By the way, may I ask what you'll be wearing to the wedding tomorrow?"

"Why do you want to know Fitz. As your date, shouldn't I keep that little detail a surprise?"

He laughed. "You're probably right."

"C'mon let's go for a walk, I'd like to get a feel of the fresh Colorado morning air."

"I don't even have a shirt on."

"You won't die, come on."

Fitz let on a displeasing groan but Olivia gave him a strict glare and he quickly hopped up and followed her outside.

**xxx**

The brunch was in full swing.

The whole bridal party showed up along with most of the family members. It was a joyous mood all around.

Olivia leaned over and whispered into Fitz's ear. "The bridesmaid on the far left is shamelessly checking you out."

His eyes found the girl Olivia was talking about and he chuckled. "How long have you been eyeing her to know that she's checking me out?"

"Oh shush, I haven't been _'eyeing' _anyone. She's just making it really obvious."

They share a good laugh. "She's beautiful though." Fitz said.

"She is. You should talk to her."

"I'm not here for hookups."

"So just keep her company. No harm done."

"No thanks. You on the other hand--"

Liv was quick to cut him off. "Ah no stop right there, I'm fine on my own thank you very much. Why don't you tell me how your speech is coming along instead."

"Well I haven't put anything down on paper yet but I'm not stressed about it."

"Yeah well you're his brother and you guys are pretty close so it should be easy to just speak from the heart. Just don't include too many embarrassing stories in your speech Fitz, he's gonna kill you."

"I can't promise you that I won't. We'll see how it goes."

"You're so petty sometimes."

"I'm not but as his big brother, embarrassing him is my job."

Just then the soon-to-be married couple approached them.

"Olivia, hi! I'm so sorry we haven't really had a chance to welcome you but we're so glad to have you here." Darin gave Fitz a pat on the back then said, "At least now I won't have to worry about this one's behavior."

Liv got up laughing and hugging both Darin and Laura. "I'm glad to take that stress off you."

"Hey little brother you're acting real cocky. It's almost like you've forgotten that I still have to deliver a very important speech tomorrow." Fitz had a smug grin on his face. "Don't make me roast you in front of all those people."

"You're gonna try and embarrass me regardless though."

"I don't even know what I'm gonna say yet."

Now Darin frowned. "What do you mean Fitz? The wedding is tomorrow. Literally just a couple of hours away."

"I'm going to do the speech Darin stop freaking out. Liv made me realize though that I don't necessarily have to come prepared with a piece of paper in my hand. I know you. I've known you forever. We're brothers. So if I'm gonna do a toast on you tomorrow it's gonna come from the heart. Besides, mom will probably kill me if I mess anything up."

Darin pulled Fitz in for a brotherly hug. "I love you man."

"And I'm your biggest inspiration yeah I know."

"You're so stupid. Olivia how do you put up with his stupidity?"

Liv, who enjoyed the wholesome interaction between the two brothers, replied, "Over time you just learn to live with it I guess."

"Ah well, we better continue with our rounds and see if everyone is still having a good time." Darin said, taking his fiancee's hand.

"Yeah man see you tomorrow. You two get a good night's rest. Tomorrow is gonna be..a lot." Fitz said chuckling.

After the brunch Fitz decided to show Liv around his hometown. They spent hours driving around before Fitz took her on a stroll through Larimer Square.

To many people they looked like a really cute couple - some even gave them that compliment. That's how Fitz and Liv were; unintentionally giving off 'couple vibes'. But in reality they were just really close friends.

"Hey! Where have you two been all day?" Margaret greeted them.

"I just showed Liv around town a bit."

"Oh that's lovely. So what do you make of our city honey, beautiful isn't it?"

Olivia smiled, "So beautiful. I don't understand how Fitz could've just left such an amazing place. It's so vibrant while other parts of it is so calming."

Fitz wrapped his arms around Liv's shoulders; casually hugging her from behind. "Technically I didn't just leave, I had to go and run a company. Plus, I'm glad I did because I got to meet my best friend."

Margaret looked at the two with pure adoration.

"It must be exciting knowing one of your son's is getting married tomorrow." Liv told Fitz's mother.

"It's very exciting but it's also kind of emotional for me. I guess it's just a motherly thing.. seeing your child getting married to a wonderful partner. You know, I always thought Fitz would be the first one to settle down."

Fitz dropped his head into the crook of Olivia's neck as he laughed.

"But he just can't seem to find the right girl." Margaret added.

"I have my girl right here though."

Olivia rolled her eyes, laughing. "Just because I feed you does not make me your girl."

"Sooo you're my homie then?"

Now she laughed wholeheartedly. "Sure. I mean I _do _got your back like a homie."

"See mom? I'm good as long as I have this girl right here in my life."

"Good. We could all do with a friend like Olivia. Oh by the way, your father and I had dinner with Laura's parents so if you guys are hungry you're gonna have to sort yourselves out."

"It's okay Margaret, Fitz took me to this place with the most delicious burgers I've ever tasted."

"Yeah so we're pretty full." Fitz added.

"Well okay then. Your father is in the study but I'm off to bed. I have to be well rested for tomorrow. Goodnight you two."

"Goodnight Margaret."

"Night mom."

Much later that night Fitz was laid out on his stomach, with his face propped up in his hands as he watched Olivia painting her nails next to him on her bed.

"I really don't know why you're still in here when you should be getting rest. I don't think Darin will find it funny if his best man showed up late because he overslept."

"I'm not tired yet."

"I thought old people are always tired."

"Ohh! I felt that one Liv."

"Well you are closing in on that big four-o."

"Still four more years. What are you getting me for my birthday this year?"

"You'll get a hug and a compliment on your hair. That should do it I think."

"The disrespect. Damn."

Olivia's laughter filled up the room. "Stop making me laugh I'm gonna mess up my nails."

"Why does it take so long though?"

"Excuse me I didn't ask you to sit and watch me do my nails."

"Can I try?"

"What?"

"Lemme do it."

"Grant don't be silly."

"Why not? Just one toe nail."

"You've got to be very precise and delicate otherwise you're gonna paint my whole foot."

He scooted closer to her. "Give me the brush. C'mon, you can just remove it again if it's not done right. You know I'm not going to stop bugging you until you actually cave in."

"Fine." She groaned and handed him the nail polish with the brush.

Fitz sat up and took her foot gently in his hands. A soft touch. He was so focused on the task at hand while Olivia on the other hand was focused on him doing it right. And all that could be heard was their breathing.

Her hand unconsciously pushed the loose curl, hanging over his forehead, back into place.

"There, what do you think?" His baritone voice eliminated the silence.

Olivia looked down at her foot and chuckled, "Well you didn't mess up."

"Just say I did a perfect job."

"You did well. Now leave, it's getting late."

Fitz laughed quietly as he got up. "Alright Pope, see you in the morning."

"Goodnight Fitz."

"Goodnight Livvie."

**xxx**

The next morning Olivia and Fitz just shared a brief good morning before Fitz was off to join the bridal party, leaving Olivia to get ready for the wedding.

She opted to wear her hair naturally in a curly updo. Dressed in a beautiful floral printed off the shoulder pencil dress which complemented her body really well. Her nude heels, matching her clutch, rounded off the gorgeous look.

"Olivia wow you look stunning."

"Thank you Margaret but I don't think I look as amazing as you do. I absolutely love the color and cut of that dress. It fits you perfectly."

"Oh thanks honey. Are you ready to go?"

"Yes."

"Great. Let's get this day started."

The wedding was great. The bride and groom looked incredible and so did their bridesmaids and groomsmen. Also, the couple had everyone emotional with their vows.

The reception was a mixture of laughter and tears. There were heartfelt and emotional speeches from the parents, while friends and other family members had people crying with laughter with old and embarrassing stories of the bride and groom.

Fitz, surprisingly, delivered a really serious speech in which he praised his brother and openly welcomed his new sister-in-law into their family.

"Hi."

"Hi, checking up on me?"

"Of course. Are you still okay, having a good time?"

"I'm genuinely enjoying myself. You did an amazing speech by the way. I loved it."

"Thanks. I barely got to see you today."

"Well you've been kinda busy."

"You look beautiful." He said casually.

"You're looking quite dapper yourself Grant."

Fitz chuckled. "C'mon let's go grab some food from the buffet."

"Please, because I'm starving."

"There's an after party tonight in honor of the newly weds. You wanna go?" Fitz asked as they walked across the room towards the buffet area.

"Sure, it should be fun."

"Cool."

**xxx**

"Liv." Fitz poked his head into her room. "You ready to go?"

Olivia wore a denim jacket over a crisp white tunic shirt dress while her medium length curly hair now cascaded down her neck - bouncing over her shoulders. She finished off her look with brown block heels which emphasized her toned bronze legs.

"I didn't bring a lot of clothes with me and I wasn't gonna keep that dress on all day so, is this outfit okay? And be honest."

"It's perfect. You look beautiful."

"Thank you."

"C'mon, we should hit the road."

"I think I'm just gonna leave my phone here since I'm not taking a bag or anything with me."

"Sure. Now let's move."

"Jeez what's the hurry Grant?" Liv asked jokingly.

Fitz had a big smile on his face when he said, "Stop teasing me Liv. Besides, the party won't wait for us."

The two friends arrived at the celebration in good spirits - letting the rhythm of the music lead them inside.

"I'm gonna get us something to drink." Fitz spoke loudly over the blaring music.

Liv gave him two thumbs up and a nod as she shimmied into the crowd of dancing people.

Olivia was a simple person. She hears music; she dances. It wasn't long until she attracted several partners to dance with.

"Hey Pope!" Fitz called out, holding their drinks up.

Her attention quickly reverted to him. "Oh c'monnn this is one of my favorite songs. Join me?"

Fitz wasn't a dancer. He would shift from one foot to the other - not necessarily on the beat but hey, he knew how to have a good time.

"Fine." He agreed as he took a swig of the golden liquor.

_"Nothing feels better.. Nothing feels better than thisss.."_ Olivia sang with her drink in her hand while dancing. And all Fitz could do was smile and join in on her mood.

She looked carefree and happy and that's exactly the energy he wants to surround himself with.

Fitz locked his arms around Liv's neck as they sang to each other. And that is what made their friendship special. They could be however silly they wanted to be around each other. They fed off each other's energy.

"Hey bro, where have you been? Liv's been looking for you."

The party has been gradually slowing down as night turned into morning.

"Oh I just stepped outside for some fresh air." Fitz replied coolly as his face turned into a mischievous smirk.

"Bullshit man, you went smoking with our dumbass cousins. That's what you guys always do when you're together, plus your eyes are a dead giveaway and I can actually smell the weed you know. It's so obvious. Will you ever quit that stuff?"

"Probably not. And besides, they had some really good weed man. That's what I miss about this place."

"The good weed?"

'Yeah." His answer was nonchalant.

"How high are you right now?"

"Would you believe me if I told you that I'm not actually high but just in a really good mood?" Fitz winked then laughed heartily at his brother's facial expression.

"You're stupid. So Olivia is okay with your habit I assume?"

"Shut up about Liv. Hell I'm a grown man Darin. And what's so bad about enjoying a nice joint every now and then?"

"You know what, let's not even talk about this anymore. I don't wanna get into a fight with my brother after such an amazing day. "

"You said Liv was looking for me.. Where is she?"

"With my wife and the rest of the ladies."

"_My wife._" Fitz repeated, chuckling. "I'm happy for you D."

"Thanks man. And which lucky lady in here is leaving with you tonight?"

"Hey I'm just here to celebrate you and your woman. That's it."

Darin's silent reaction really piqued Fitz's interest. "What?"

"No nothing.. Well, I mean I just figured since you're single that you'd be putting yourself out there. Not that you really have to, you're Fitzgerald Grant, you attract females like magnets."

_"So the girl you were dancing with earlier is not your girl?" _A guy asked coming up behind them.

"Excuse me? Who the hell are you? Darin do you know this guy?"

"This is Enzo. Laura's boss's son who came because his father couldn't make it."

"So if the invitation wasn't directed at him why is he here?" Fitz asked with an attitude.

"_I actually work for my father so Laura and I are colleagues. I'd say we get along pretty well."_

"Enzo, I'm glad you could be here with us today and share our joy but my brother and I were in the middle of a private conversation."

_"Oh yeah no of course, I was just coming over here to thank you for a really awesome day._"

"I see."

_"And hey man.." Enzo turned towards Fitz, "..I don't wanna overstep any boundaries but was that your girl or not?"_

"Darin please tell this man to excuse himself."

_"I can ask can't I? If she belongs to you then I'll back off for sure man." Enzo insisted._

"She doesn't belong to me. She's nobody's property. Do you get that?"

_"Man what's the deal here? Is she like your side chick or something?"_

"My-- My side chick?" Fitz asked with a humourless chuckle.

_"Hey man I'm not judging. Sometimes a little something on the side is exactly what we need. And that girl is smokin. Damn!"_

"That woman, is my friend. So you better stop talking shit and learn to fucking respect women."

_"Whoa hey dude no need to get all sensitive. But if that's how you dance with your friends then please tell me where I can find myself a beautiful friend like that to ya know, dance with."_

Fitz took a step back. He was starting to lose his temper. Darin watched his brother's reaction and decided to intervene.

"Enzo, come on man. Let's not do this right now. Not here. Not tonight. Please. Laura and I have great respect for your dad. He has really helped shaped her career and for that we're both grateful. So what I'm trying to say is, let's not let anything happen here tonight that'll lead to any bad blood between any of us."

_Enzo lifted his hands in an act of innocence. "I hear you man. Anyway I already spoke to Laura but thanks again for today."_

The Grant brothers watched him leave.

"I was_ this_ close to breaking his face." Fitz said, still looking annoyed.

"I'm glad you kept your cool."

"Talking shit about Liv like that? The fuck is wrong with him."

"Hey, calm down. He's an idiot. A spoilt kid who still needs to learn a lot about life. Don't let him get to you. C'mon, how about a drink?"

"A drink right now sounds perfect. Preferably guava juice or chocolate milk."

"What the hell is wrong with you. You know this is a party for grown ups and not a bunch of two year olds right?"

"Okay so maybe the chocolate milk was a stretch."

"That weed got you messed up." Darin laughed as the two of them approached the bar counter. "Luckily for you there's a variety of juice and soda's for the people who don't drink any alcohol. But guava though, really? That's nasty."

"Darin get your head out of your ass. Guava juice is freakin awesome and man that shit just hit different after you've had a joint."

"Whatever you say."

"One day you'll smoke with me, I just know it. And you'll enjoy it and the guava juice afterwards."

Darin laughed. "Not likely."

"It's not illegal D. Live a little."

"Fitzgerald get your damn juice and shut up." Darin then spotted Liv heading towards them. "Oh look! Olivia's coming over."

"Hey boys. Darin your wife is requesting your presence." Liv said with a smile.

"I guess that's my cue to leave. And just in case I don't see you guys again; it was really nice having you here for a fun evening. Tonight was a great ending to a special day."

"See you bro. Congrats again." Fitz said with a handshake.

With Darin now gone Olivia focused her attention solely on her best friend. "Juice?"

He chuckled as he shrugged, "I had a craving."

Olivia hopped up on the barstool next to his. "Give me your car keys."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm not letting you drive if you're high."

_Of course she knew. Because she knows him_ _unlike anyone else._

He took out his keys and held it out. "You've seen me high before. Do you think I'm high right now?"

"Don't get smart with me. You just love to boast about your tolerance to marijuana. Still though, I'm not taking any chances." She reached out to take the keys from him.

"People still do that?" He was staring at the pen written phone number on her arm. Smirking.

"Well I don't have my phone here and I wasn't just gonna give my number to a stranger so.."

"Cute girl?"

"Oh she's hot. Not my usual type but there's just something about her."

"Oh yeah? So what makes her _not _your type?"

"The tattoos and piercings and big personality. Oh! And she's a biker. But for some reason all of that makes her kind of hot you know."

"Sounds like you're definitely going to be using that number."

Olivia laughed. "I don't know. . Plus she's from around here and I'm in Philly so it's not like we could just meet up whenever."

"Hey you never know, she might be down to visit you."

"We don't even know each other like that Grant, why would she come all the way to Philly?"

"I don't know know if you're aware of this, but it's kinda hard to say no to you Livvie."

"_That_ is _not_ true."

"It is."

"Maybe I should get you and Abby to give me some dating tips."

"You don't need it. C'mon you'll be just fine."

"I've just recently gotten out of a relationship of three years Grant. And even before that I never really put myself out there. I'm shy when it comes to dating. I'm not saying I want to start seeing other women at this moment in time but eventually."

Fitz cupped her face with both hands. "Will you stop?"

Olivia smiled widely at his reaction to her mini rant and dropped her head on his chest. "I think this weekend's love fest is getting to me."

"Okay so maybe it was stupid of me to bring you to a wedding when you're still trying to get over your breakup."

Olivia straightened up, looking at him directly. "I'm over it."

"Okay. Should we head home or would you like to stay a little longer?"

"I had tons of fun tonight but I think we should call it a night."

**xxx**

"You going to bed?" Fitz asked as they entered his parents home upon returning from the celebratory party.

"Probably, why?"

"I'm gonna be up for a while."

"And you want some company."

"Yeah."

"It's.." She grabbed his wrist to check the time on his watch. ".. almost three a.m"

"I'm starving. If you stay up with me I'll make you a bacon and egg sandwich. Maybe I'll even add some cheese." He smirked. "Come on, you can't say no to that."

"You're a bad influence Grant. If either one of your parents come down here I'm putting all the blame on you."

"I'm okay with that."

Olivia kicked off her shoes as she hopped onto the chair by the kitchen island.

They made small talk while Fitz prepared their sandwiches.

"Want something to drink?"

"I'll take water." Liv replied. "But let me just run to the bathroom quickly before I dig into this yummy sandwich."

"Okay."

Olivia emerged ten minutes later. She was wearing sweatpants and a plain t-shirt.

"I thought you fell asleep on the toilet."

"I figured I might as well put on some comfy clothes and wash my face while I was upstairs. What happened to your sandwich?"

"I ate it. I told you I was starving. Plus you were gone a long time."

"I'm just glad you didn't eat mine as well."

"I was tempted but I knew you would've killed me."

"You got that right."

Leaning with his elbows on the counter top Fitz was going through a few texts on his phone. Mindlessly he looked up and was met by the image of his best friend happily enjoying her food. A minute went by and he didn't even realize that he was now just staring at her.

_An epiphany. Commonly defined as a moment of sudden and great revelation or realization._

Yes. An epiphany. That thing that hits us when we least expect it. Those mental moments which provide instant clarity.

A wave of realization washed over Fitz. And in that particular moment he was looking at his best friend differently.

He knew he cared about her more than he ever cared about anyone else. She obviously meant a lot to him.

But now, during his moment of clarity, Fitz was overcome by her raw natural beauty. Her authenticity.

It was then that Fitz realized that he might actually have feelings for Olivia.

In his head, all he could hear himself say was **_"holy shit, holy shit, holy shit."_** Because he couldn't believe it. It took him by surprise.

Has he been in denial about his feelings for all this time up until this very moment? It couldn't be.

There was never anything there. He was sure.

He has always seen Olivia as his friend.

And there it was again. **_"holy shit, holy shit, holy shit."_**

This isn't right. And yet, the feelings are there.

He's struggling to decipher everything that just hit him all at once.

Why? Why now?

She's his best friend. Plus, she's gay. Oh, and she will probably laugh if she knew about his sudden realization.

**_"holy shit, holy shit, holy shit._**"

His grandmother used to say that epiphanies are good, but what mattered most was what you do with that newfound clarity.

He doesn't want to mess up their friendship.

"You okay?"

Her voice literally startled him back into reality.

"Uh yeah. Yes. I'm good."

"You look like you've just gotten the fright of your life. What's bothering you?"

"Nothing." He answered quickly. "I'm just.. thinking, that's all."

"Then think about something else. Because whatever is on your mind right now is obviously stressing you out. This sandwich is really nice, thank you."

She made life simple for him.

Fitz took a deep breath then continued to chuckle. "Anything you'll eat at three in the morning will be delicious."

He waited for her to finish her sandwich then the pair moved to the living room where they talked about the days events.

"When was the last time you attended a wedding?" Fitz asked Olivia.

"Oh man.. I can count on my one hand the amount of weddings I've been to."

"Ha! Me too."

Olivia yawned. "If I fall asleep on this couch you're carrying me to my bed." Exhaustion was creeping up on her.

"Wanna watch something on tv?"

"No, I don't want to disturb your parents sleep."

"So we're just gonna sit here in silence?" Fitz chuckled.

"Does that make you uncomfortable?" Her tone was teasing as she gave him a tired smile.

Her smile had always been contagious. So Fitz grinned back. "Not at all."

Olivia let out a quiet laugh as she relaxed back into the couch. Resting her the back of her head against it with her eyes closed.

He caught himself momentarily staring again. Taking in all the contours of her face.

"Hey Liv?"

"What."

"We can talk about anything.. right?" He asked a bit hesitantly.

She lifted her head to look at him. "Of course."

His shaky breath didn't didn't go past her. She caught on that he was nervous.

"This about that thing you were thinking about earlier?" Liv asked.

They now sat with their bodies turned to one another.

"Yes."

"Then talk to me Grant."

"I-- How do I even-- Oh man..."

Olivia crinkled her nose with worry. "Is it something bad? Maybe I can help."

Fitz brushed his hands over his face whereafter he made direct eye contact with her and made his confession. "I.. I think-- I know this is wrong but I have feelings for you Olivia."

She didn't know whether to take it seriously or as a joke which is why her words escaped her and she sat there with nothing to say.

"I might be falling for you and I don't know how to deal with it." He continued.

Her tired body now wide awake. "What are you talking about Fitz? Seriously. Are you sure you're not high?"

"Have you ever had an epiphany?"

"I guess. ."

"Well I had one earlier and I came to realize that I have these other feelings for you. I-- This is not a joke Liv. And I'm being open with you because I'm conflicted. I mean we're friends; have been for so long and between the two of us there's never been any uncertainty about the nature of our relationship."

"I just don't get it. You didn't forget about the fact that I'm gay?"

"I'm well aware of your sexuality."

"Then how can you have feelings for me?"

"Because you're beautiful and smart and funny and ao talented. You get me. You understand me and we crack each other up. I trust you and you trust me. You uplift me; driving me to be a better person. And even though we're different on so many levels we still connect so effortlessly. We also share this amazing chemistry-- Tell me I'm crazy. Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me anything, because I'm freaking out right now."

"We have a very close bond, you're right but that's where it ends. Hell, besides my preference for women, I'm not even your type. I've known you long enough to know that you have a type. We are two different people Fitz."

"I'm just trying to figure this out Liv. I really don't know what to make of it right now."

"I don't want to lose you as a friend. I really don't."

"Do you think that's what I want? I don't want to lose you either, okay. That's why I'm being honest with you."

"So Abby was right, is this why you always chose me above anyone else even your girlfriend and sometimes your work?"

"No. You were always important to me but not because of a crush, but out of appreciation for your friendship. You were always a true friend to me."

"I guess it's not uncommon for a friend to develop feelings for another friend. It happens, right?"

Fitz sighed as he took a hold of her hands "I don't want to complicate things between us or jeopardize our friendship Livvie."

"So how do we go forward knowing that you have these feelings?"

"What do you mean? We just maintain our strong, open and honest friendship since we both value it so much."

They sit in silence. Digesting everything that was said during their conversation.

After minutes passed Liv broke the silence. "Thank you for your honesty at least. I appreciate it. I can imagine how difficult that must've been for you."

"Why don't you get some sleep. You must be tired by now." Fitz said with a soft smile.

"Yeah. I'll see you in the morning. Goodnight Fitz."

"Goodnight Olivia."

Sitting alone in his parents living room at 04:15 a.m, Fitz decided that the joint in his shirt pocket would bring him a lot of relief from all his mixed up feelings and emotions. So he got up and headed out into the backyard where he lit up his joint and stared up into the sky full of stars.


	5. chapter 4

"Wow... I-- Wow."

A week after _that_ conversation between Fitz and Olivia, she had eventually decided to discuss it with her trusted friend, Abby.

"That's all you're going to say?"

Abby wasn't exactly shocked. It just genuinely surprised her that Fitz had admitted his feelings for Liv. "Look, you know I've always said that the two of you would actually make a great couple but I'm just trying to wrap my head around this. He really just blurted it out?"

"Well not blurted it out but it definitely caught me off guard."

"So then what happened?"

"We talked."

Abby gave her best friend a comforting smile. "You talked. Okay. That's good."

"We both value our friendship."

"Of course. So how do you move forward now that he's made you aware of his feelings?"

"We remain friends, I mean why not?"

"But you'll always have that in the back of your mind now. Are you sure it won't have an impact on your friendship?"

Olivia bit the inside of her cheek, then sighed. "I don't know Abby. I really don't."

"You and I have always been really close; literally like sisters. But the bond you share with Fitz is different and I know I always bicker back and forth with him but I do respect his role in your life because I know he cares a lot about you. You don't want to lose him do you?"

"I don't." Liv answered, shaking her head.

After a moment of comfortable silence Abby looked over at Liv. "This might probably sound a little bizarre to you but..do you-- Is there some part of you that feels the same way about him?"

Olivia made a face. "I'm a whole lesbian."

"That doesn't make it impossible for you to develop feelings for a guy. It happens sometimes."

"I'm not in love with him Abby." Liv stated matter-of-factly.

"You care about him. And I really wouldn't describe your relationship as a brother-sister type of relationship. I'm not saying that you're in love with him, I'm not. But from the outside looking in, you two have always looked like a couple."

"I don't think anything you're saying right now is being helpful."

"Hey as your best friend, I'm required to be honest with you."

"And I appreciate that but come on Abby."

"He knows you're gay Liv. So I think that he feels like there might be a chance that you feel the same way which is why he laid it all out."

"I have never given him any indication that could've lead him to think that way."

"Okay well then just stay friends then and don't let things get awkward."

"We intend to and it won't. We've never been awkward."

"You know what? I really admire the way you two are handling this like grown ups. Talking it through and trying to understand. You guys are way more mature than I am." Abby offered a laugh.

"Don't worry, it's not always fun being an adult and making mature decisions. You'll see one day when you get there." Liv joked causing them both to erupt in a fit of laughter.

**XXX**

_2 months later. . ._

"Excuse me. I need to use the restroom." Olivia said to the three other people at the table.

Abby's eyes followed her, "Wait, I'll go with you." So the two ladies left. Leaving Fitz and the other person alone at the table.

Abby had a pretty good idea of what was up with her friend. It was amusing really.

"You okay?" She asked re-doing her lipstick while Olivia washed her hands.

"Sure."

"How do we feel about her?"

"Who are you talking about?" Liv asked, getting her hand lotion out of her bag.

"Fitzgerald's date. She seems okay, right?"

"She's an old college buddy, not his date." Liv paused then continued, "She's a little extra though. I mean she's all over him like she's trying to prove something."

"Are you sure they're not intimate 'cause sis was hanging on to him like he's her one and only."

Olivia just rolled her eyes. "Who knows. But still, it's as if she's trying to show off that she knew Fitz way before us - that they have a history. Talk about petty."

Abby's soft chuckle earned her a confused frown from Liv. "What's so funny?" Asked Olivia.

"I'm going to ask you something and you gotta answer it honestly, okay?"

"Uh whatever, okay."

"Are you jealous?"

"Jealous?" Olivia scoffed. "Jealous of what exactly?"

"Fitz and his lady friend."

"And why the hell would I be jealous Abby?" She asked with an attitude which left Abby with a smirk.

"I wouldn't know, you tell me. I mean it's not like you have feelings for him or anything. Pfft that would be crazy. " Abby was teasing her and enjoying it.

"You're trying to be funny huh?" Olivia asked dryly.

"Not at all. But I gotta say, all the signs are there Liv. Just admit it; seeing him with that woman out there is making you feel some type of way."

Olivia avoided eye contact, looking at her reflection in the wide mirror on the bathroom wall.

"Hey, it's me you're talking to." Abby said with reasurrance. "I'm not judging you."

"I can't have feelings for him." Her voice was soft. The statement was directed more to her reflection in the mirror than to her red headed friend.

Abby moved closer to Liv and ran a comforting hand up and down her back. "It's okay you know."

"What is happening Abby? I-- He's my friend. He's a guy. He's straight. I'm gay. This doesn't make sense. Ugh!"

"Hey c'mon, don't be so hard on yourself. Sometimes life comes with interesting twists and turns."

They stayed quiet when two other women entered.

"How about we step outside for some fresh air." Abby suggested which lead them to slip out front of the trendy lounge.

"Want a cigarette?"

With giggling laughter Olivia replied, "Neither one of us even smoke Abby!"

"I know but in a situation like this I feel like a cigarette could be totally useful."

"Yeah I know what you mean. Fuck! This is all his fault!"

"Oh?"

"Well not really but still. . What am I going to do Abby?"

"First of all, do you admit to having feelings for him?"

"...no."

"Liv. ."

"What? I don't know what I'm feeling, all I know is that little miss sunshine in there is starting to annoy me."

"Oh my word you guys are complicated as hell you know that?"

"No shit. This is all messed up."

"Okay. I think I might have a solution to clear things up for both of you once and for all."

"And what's that?"

"Kiss him."

Olivia's eyes grew twice it's normal size as her mouth fell open. "WHAT?" she asked incredulously.

"Kiss him. That's the only solution. A kiss will tell you exactly what you need to know. It'll clear up all the blurred lines."

"I'm not kissing Fitz." Olivia replied calmly.

"Well you two could always talk it out. Have that conversation again, only this time the roles will be reversed. You're gonna tell him how you feel--"

"_I_ don't even know how I feel." Liv interjected.

"--you're gonna tell him how you feel when seeing him with other girls." Abby corrected herself. "And then you're both gonna agree that pursuing anything more than a platonic friendship is insane and will then continue to be just friends. After a while it's going to start to affect your friendship because neither one of you can stand the sight of the other one dating other people. Now eventually your friendship will be put in jeopardy because you guys were too scared to take that risk on each other."

"Remember when you told me how much you respected us for handling this situation so maturely?" Liv deadpanned.

"Yeah well you two are making my head spin with all these uncertain feelings and emotions. Do you want to stay friends and always wonder about what could have been? Or would you rather take the risk and cross that line even if it doesn't work out? Because even if things don't work out, you could always still be friends but at least you won't have to walk around with all these pent up feelings."

"We should probably get back inside." Liv said, changing the subject.

"Yeah.."

Fitz kept a steady gaze on Olivia the minute he saw them nearing the table.

"Everything okay? You two have been gone for a while."

"We ran into an old friend of ours. You know how that goes once you get talking." Abby lied. But Fitz knew something was up because Liv wasn't her usual self.

"Of course."

"We should probably ask for the bill.. Unless any of you still wants to order something." Olivia told the group.

"I already took care of it while you were gone." Came Fitz's reply.

"Fitz that really wasn't necessary. I figured we'd just split the bill."

"It's fine Livvie. Really."

"Olivia's right. We can't expect you to just pay for us."

"Relax Whelan, it's really okay."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." Fitz chuckled.

**XXX**

About 15 minutes after arriving home to her apartment, there was a knock on Liv's door.

"Who is it?" She asked, not bothering to look through the peephole.

"It's me."

Olivia sighed upon hearing that all familiar baritone voice. She opened the door.

"Hi."

"Hi."

"Can I come in?"

"Uh, sure."

"Thanks."

They moved in sync as they sat down on the couch.

"So what brings you by?"

"I wanted to check up on you."

She laughed softly. "I'm okay Fitz. Didn't we just all have a nice evening?"

"Something's off. I can tell. Why won't you tell me what's bothering you."

"It's not a big deal. Your date was enjoying herself tonight, I'm glad you brought her out to meet us. "

"Even if it's not a big deal, as your friend, I want to help. And c'mon now, you know she's just an old friend. I only brought her because she wanted to catch up and that was the perfect opportunity. But yeah, she uhh, she seemed to have fun."

"There's some things that I can and should handle on my own Fitz. And from her part it looked like you were more than old college friends."

"Well we're not. Is that what's bothering you?"

"What? No. Why would it bother me? You can date whoever you want." She replied quickly.

"You know I would've told you if there was anything going on between me and her. "

"Yes I know that." They came to a silent agreement.

"So what was your friend's name?" Fitz asked.

"What?"

"The one you and Abby said you ran into tonight." He clarified.

"Oh.. Um.."

"Livvie.. " He smiled and and it made her want to tell him all about what's going on in her head right now. "You know you can't lie to me."

"Technically I'm not lying since Abby was the one who told you that story."

"Talk to me."

She looked into his eyes then looked away. "I can't.. "

"Why not?" He asked, clasping his hands together and resting his forearms on his thighs - ready to listen to her explanation.

"Because.. I don't know what to tell you."

"Why do I have a feeling that whatever is going on has something to do with our conversation we had about two months ago."

"Do you-- Are you over the way you said you felt.. about me?"

"You want my honest answer?"

"Yes."

"I still feel the same."

"Can I ask you something else?"

"Sure."

"How would you feel if I had to start seeing someone?"

"Uhm.. Well, firstly I want you to be happy. I can't tell you what to do but if you find someone that makes you happy then of course I wouldn't stand in the way of that. Your happiness is way more important."

"How do you know that what you're feeling is real? Like.. I don't know how to put this.. How sure are you about your feelings?"

"Look Liv, I'm just happy we're still friends so let's not-- Let's not talk about this anymore. I know where you stand. Nothing's ever gonna happen between us for several reasons so why discuss it any further. I'm sorry for confusing you. I don't know if it's unfortunate or inconvenient that I've developed feelings for you but I have and I'm just gonna have to push that aside if we want to continue having a naturally good friendship. "

They took a pause.

"Did you tell Abby?"

"I did." Liv answered.

"I bet she thought I was stupid and had a good laugh." He said only half joking.

"She didn't. Why would you think that?"

Fitz shrugged. "..I don't know."

"Well if you're stupid then I'm right there with you." Liv admitted with a nervous giggle.

"What?"

"Abby said if I do this it'll bring clarity to both of us."

"Liv what are you talki--"

She cut him off by launching her lips on to his. All tentatively, because she was definitely not certain about this kiss.

Fitz was frozen in his spot. His eyebrows creased and his eyes were still very agape. But that lasted for a few seconds as his features eventually softened and his lips started to move with hers.

They were kissing now. It was real. His one hand found the back of her neck as he pulled her in - closer to him.

Olivia didn't know what the hell was happening but her body was feeling very tingly and her ears were practically on fire. Her heart was pounding against her chest - especially when Fitz sucked on her bottom lip and stuck his tongue in her mouth.

She stroked his stubbly cheek with her palm as they're make out session heated up.

Fitz on the other hand could feel his heart beat in his ears. This moment was definitely one of wonderment.

The kiss however came to an abrupt end when Olivia backed away. She couldn't anymore. She was scared.. afraid. Because she was enjoying it.

_Why was she enjoying it!?_

There was a quiet moment between the two before Liv spoke. "I-- You should go."

"Olivia.. I think we should talk."

"No, Fitz. Please just-- Please go?"

"You haven't been honest with me. That kiss. . You felt it too didn't you?"

"I need to rest. We can talk tomorrow."

Fitz looked at her with soft eyes. "Okay." He pressed a light kiss on her forehead. "We'll talk tomorrow. Goodnight Livvie."

"Goodnight Fitz."

The moment he left Olivia opened up a bottle of wine and started drinking.

After two glasses she laid her head down on the cold kitchen counter and closed her eyes. She replayed her kiss with Fitz over and over in her mind and everytime there was a fluttering going on inside her belly.

_Could she really be falling for Fitz? Her Fitz? Her guy best friend?_

_'You're lesbian Olivia' Said the small voice in her head._

So she finished half the bottle and pulled out her phone.

"Hey. Yeah I know, it's been a while and you probably didn't expect to hear from me again..at all. Are you busy? Could you come over?"

She needed to get Fitz out of her system.

**XXX**

Hard nipples were rubbing on each other as they kissed wildly on the bed. Olivia legs was flipped open as the other girl straddled her.

"Fuck I've missed you." Logan groaned into Liv's neck. But Olivia didn't reply, she was too focused on getting Fitz off her mind - which seemed impossible at the moment.

Everytime she closed her eyes she imagined Fitz kissing her. She could somehow still smell him. She could still feel how his teeth grazed her lower lip during that kiss. And the taste of his tongue still lingered in her mouth.

"Logan stop!"

"You're funny." Came Logan's reply, with a chuckle.

"No I'm serious Logan. Stop." Olivia moved out of her grasp and grabbed a pillow to cover her naked body. "This was a mistake. I'm so sorry."

"Really Olivia??"

Liv just nodded.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me. So was this your way of getting back at me for our breakup? Because that's a shitty move Olivia, especially for you."

"It's not like that. I just had a lot to drink and.. Look I'm sorry, okay? It was wrong of me to lead you on."

"You know what? Forget it. It was foolish of me to even show up here. But that's a mistake I'll never make again." Logan got up and got dressed. "And for what it's worth, you should let that person know how you're feeling. Using me for sex isn't gonna make your feelings go away."

"Excuse me?"

"You forget I know you Olivia. And tonight your body and your mind were in two different places."

"I'm really sorry Logan."

"It's okay. In a way I feel like I deserved it. I broke your heart." A short silence fell over them before Logan spoke up again "Anyway, I'll just see myself out. Bye Liv."

"Bye Logan."

**XXX**

It has been three days since their kiss. Three days since they last spoke, even though Liv had agreed they would talk.

For three days she has been avoiding him. But that stopped today as she waited for him on the front steps of his house.

It took almost an half-hour until his black Mercedes pulled up.

"Hi." Liv greeted him with a smile. She was genuinely happy to see him after not seeing him for the past couple of days.

Fitz stood in front of her and breathed a sigh of relief. He had thought their friendship was over.

"Hi."

"I've been avoiding you." Her admittance sounded slightly sheepish.

"You have."

"I'm sorry. I-- Can we have that talk now? I mean unless you don't have time. I probably should have called first." She rambled.

"It's okay. We can talk. C'mon, let's go inside."

"Okay." Olivia waited for him to unlock the door then followed him into his home.

"Would you like to have some coffee or anything?" Fitz offered.

"Uh no thanks."

"Hey Liv?"

"Yeah?"

Fitz took off his tie, rolled up his sleeves and walked over to Olivia - giving her a hug. "I'm not mad at you, you can relax and stop being so tense."

Wrapping her arms around him, Olivia took a deep breath in and out. She was finding so much comfort in his embrace.

"Wanna sit down and talk now?" He asked and she nodded. So they moved to the couch.

"I don't know where to begin." Olivia admitted.

"How about you tell me why you kissed me. Which apparently was Abby's idea?"

"I told her..that I thought that I might also have feelings..for you."

"When I told you how I felt about you I never expected you to feel the same. I just wanted you to know. I hope that because of that I didn't push you into thinking that you had to feel a certain way as well."

"It's not like that. I guess because the feeling was foreign to me I chose to ignore it. I mean I definitely loved you as a friend, no doubt about it. But after what you told me and seeing you with Hillary the other night. . I guess I didn't know that deep down there was more to it. It wasn't just me being protective over my best friend. I didn't know I was actually attracted to you like that because technically I'm not supposed to be you know? I mean I'm gay. So you can imagine how confused I was - rethinking my identity."

"It was never my intention to put you through all that. Maybe I never should have said anything.. I don't want you to question who you are and cause you any strain."

"But you _did_ tell me. And I _did_ end up kissing you.. And now we're here."

"You really caught me off guard with that kiss." Fitz chuckled softly.

"The first and last time I kissed a boy was on a dare in high school and I hated it."

"And? Did you hate our kiss? Be honest."

"I didn't."

"Neither did I."

"I have to tell you something though."

"What's that?"

"That same night, after you had left, I was so out of it and tried to convince myself that I didn't feel anything during our kiss.. that it didn't mean anything. So to prove to myself that I wasn't losing it and that I was definitely still super gay, I-- I made a mistake. I called my ex."

"Logan?" Surprise evident in his voice. He knew how much strain Olivia took from her breakup with Logan.

"Yes. But before I called her and invited her over, I had a few glasses of wine. I was being irresponsible."

"Did you.. You know.." Fitz wasn't sure if he should actually be hurt if she did end up having sex with her ex on the same night she had kissed him.

"Not exactly. I couldn't, because it was impossible to forget about that kiss and to get you off my mind. I was stupid to think having sex with my ex would solve anything. I still regret my decision to call her. Although, I'm glad we didn't go all the way there because it would've complicated things a lot more for me."

"It's okay Livvie. I understand." And he did. But he was also relieved that she didn't have sex with Logan.

"What did you do after you left my place?"

"I uh.." He chuckled, "...I actually went to the gym. I figured that way I could clear my head. But like you said, nothing was enough to provide a distraction because occasionally I would just stare out in front of me and I'd still be able to feel your lips on mine."

"What happens now?" Her soft tone indicated a sense of vulnerability. She was scared..unsure.

"Whatever you want." With a heartwarming smile Fitz rested his hand on her leg, giving it a slight squeeze to assure her that he wasn't going to push or force her into anything she wasn't ready for.

"Don't do that. Don't leave it all up to me." Liv whispered back.

"Well I can't make a decision for you Livvie. Just remember, no matter what.. I'll always be in your life."

"What if I want this. What if.. what if I want to give us a try even though I'll be way out of my comfort zone. And even though it'll take me time, probably a lot of time to get comfortable with you on an intimate level and to get used to the idea of us being more than just friends."

"I would love to pursue a relationship with you Livvie and I'm in no rush. We can take this slow - at your pace. I promise not to put any pressure on you whatsoever. As long as I can make you happy."

"What if it doesn't work out?"

"There's no answer for that until we at least try first, right?"

Fitz noticed Olivia was overthinking. He could see from her body language and the way she avoided eye contact that she was caught up in her head a little bit. So he knew.. He knew he had to give her reason to trust him on this. He had to make sure that she knew he was serious and wouldn't let her down.

That's when he decided to cup her face in his palms, leaving her no choice but to look into his eyes.

"I'm in this with you Livvie. We're in this together."

"Promise?"

He smiled and nodded. "I promise." That's when Fitz leaned in to kiss her.

It was a slow and tender kiss. They both felt a spark as the kiss deepened. Olivia's hands travelled to the nape of his neck as her fingers combed through the soft hair.

Fitz pulled back and gave her his most genuine smile. It was captivating. One where she could see his soul shining through. Literally his whole face was smiling, that's how happy he was.

"Stop it." Olivia was actually blushing as she playfully pushed him back.

He couldn't help but to laugh at her being so adorable. "What?"

"Stop smiling like that."

"Why?" Fitz asked, his smile turning into a charming grin as he pulled her body against his solid chest - laughing into her hair.

"Just stop it, okay." She replied with laughter in her voice.

Olivia's cheeks was still a slight shade of pink. Fitz was really starting to have an effect on her.

When the laughter died down they sat in silence, wrapped up in an embrace.

"I should get home." Liv broke the silence.

Fitz nodded as they got up from the couch. "I'll walk you out."

"Okay."

The two made it outside to Liv's car. "Can I give you a hug?"

"You kiss me without asking but now you're asking for a hug? What's up with that Grant?" She was being her usual playful self and he was happy. From the way he found her waiting for him at his front door earlier it was certainly a welcomed upgrade to see her in such a pleasant mood.

"I could always ask for a kiss instead of that's what you're saying Pope." He matched her humour.

Olivia chuckled and stepped into his large frame for a hug. "I'm really happy that I came here instead of continuing to ignore you."

"Me too. Although I gotta say, those couple of days felt awful not knowing whether or not I had lost my best friend."

"I'm sorry."

"No no, it's okay. You needed time to process everything."

Liv released a sigh of content. "Goodnight Grant. Oh-" She giggled, "I should probably stop calling you that now."

Fitz pressed a loving kiss to her forehead. "Don't. I like it. In fact, I don't want you to change anything about you just because we're going to be in a relationship now. I fell for this version of you and that's who I wanna be with."

"Have you always been so sweet?"

"Uh-huh, but you used to make fun of me because of it, remember?"

"I did no such thing!" She laughed.

Fitz kissed both her cheeks then let her out of his arms. "Goodnight Livvie. Let me know when you get home, okay?"

"Okay." She replied getting into her car. "Bye Grant."

"Drive safe." He waved as she drove off.

Fitz was left standing there with the biggest grin on his face. He wanted to drop down to his knees and thank God for everything that had transpired..for his Livvie.. He was so thankful.


	6. chapter 5

They have been together now for a month officially as a couple. A month of nothing but pure happiness for both Olivia and Fitz.

Day by day Olivia became more comfortable being in a relationship with him. She became more and more assure of her feelings. And even though they've been dating for a month, he still made her blush with every compliment and every kiss but it was starting to feel more natural and not so foreign. When she's with him it's easy. She didn't question her identity anymore, because he made her feel so secure in her own skin. Although, Olivia still couldn't help but to think about people's reactions when they saw her with him and _that, _that is what caused her to be quite hesitant with any kind of public display of affection.

Liv knew that never in a million years would she have fallen for a guy; any guy. But Fitz was different. In a weird way it almost felt as if the universe reserved him for her. He was her exception. He was her person.

"Hi. Is that for me?"

Fitz showed up at her dance studio with a treat in his hands. "It might be for Harrison." He shrugged.

"Grant, don't get cute with me. C'mon hand it over."

"Someone's grumpy."

"You know what? Go and enjoy your coffee and whatever's in that takeaway box with your buddy Harrison then. I don't care." Olivia feigned annoyance.

Fitz started laughing. "Sure if that's what you want. Oh and just so you know, there's carrot cake in here."

Carrot cake was her favorite.

"Okay okay, I take it back. You can stay."

"Yeah, I thought so." He smirked and sauntered over to where she stood. "Kiss for the cake?"

She was slightly hesitant. _What if one of her instructors saw them?_

As of yet, with the exception of Abby and their families, no one knew about the romantic turn her friendship took with Fitz.

"I'll settle for a hug." Fitz told Liv, sensing the slight hesitance from her.

Olivia gave him a soft smile as she stepped into his arms and he held her tightly. Both releasing a sigh of contentment.

"Wait, I just realized you only brought one coffee." Liv said after he released her from his embrace.

"Yeah, for you. I can't stay. I actually have a meeting in about.." He scanned his watch, ".. twenty seven minutes."

She pouted. "You're no fun."

"I'll swing by your place after work, how about that?"

"I'd like that although I wasn't planning on cooking tonight."

Fitz strode over to the small wooden table nearby where he placed down the coffee and cake before making his way back to Liv.

"Leave it all to me." He said, resting his hands on her hips. "There's this really amazing girl who taught me a thing or two on how to cook and according to her I'm really good. So, you know, I wouldn't mind putting something together for us." He winked.

"Oh she said you're really good huh?"

"Yup. But just between the two of us.." He leaned in and whispered into her ear, "..I think she only said that 'cause she likes me."

Olivia laughed, giving him a playful slap on his chest. "Shut up, shouldn't you be on your way to a meeting anyway?"

He checked his watch again, "Yes. So tonight?"

"Tonight is on. I guess I'll be in charge of the wine if you're cooking."

"Sounds about right since you have excellent taste in wine."

For a moment they get lost staring into each other's eyes.

"You should--" . "I should probably--" They spoke simultaneously then chuckled.

"Go. I should go." Fitz said staring at Olivia's lips.

She knew what was on his mind so she decided what-the-hell, if someone walked in on them or saw them then so be it. She's not ashamed to be with Fitz so why shy away.

So Olivia locked her arms around his neck and pulled him down into a gentle kiss. "Now go before you miss your meeting." Liv said with a playful smile.

"You're so beautiful." Fitz sounded mesmerized as he brushed his thumb over the tip of her nose. "I'll see you tonight Livvie. Enjoy the cake and don't share it with anyone."

"Not even Harrison?" She teased him.

He was already on his way to the door when he replied, "Definitely not Harrison!"

Olivia was left standing with a goofy grin after Fitz had made his exit.

* * *

"Are you sure you don't need a hand?" Olivia asked for about the fourth time as she stood on the other side of the kitchen watching Fitz cook.

"Will you just sit back and relax?" He laughed. "Thank you for wanting to help but I've got this."

"Fine, whatever." Liv huffed with mock irritation as she hopped onto the countertop.

Fitz closed the lid on the pot and strolled over to her, standing between her legs. "You're something else you know that?"

"I'm just so used to being the one doing all the cooking. Not that I'm complaining because I do love to cook."

"Well then I guess this means I'll just have to start cooking for you more often so that you can get used to it." He said with a smile.

"You do realize that you'll be feeding Abby as well and she's very specific about her food."

"Wait she's not coming over tonight is she??" He asked rather quickly which had Olivia in a fit of giggles.

"Aww look at that worried little face."

"Livvie please don't mock me."

She ran her fingers through his thick curls before capturing his lips in a wholesome kiss.

"Okay, if you're gonna be kissing me like that, I say you can mock me all you want." Fitz joked as they pulled apart.

"Finish cooking mister, I'm actually starving." Liv replied shyly.

After dinner the two retired to Liv's bedroom with the great idea of catching up on some series but two and a half episodes into Lucifer and they were both fast asleep.

Somewhere at around 2am Liv stirred awake. She was spooned tightly into Fitz. So much so, that she could feel his bulge in all it's glory pressing through the fabric of her cotton shorts. But what initially had her waking up was his large hand giving her breast a firm squeeze, with just the right kind of pressure that she couldn't decide whether she was feeling pain or pleasure.

Olivia's skin began to catch heat and her breath quickened as she closed her eyes and savoured the feeling. It was obviously the first time a guy touched her like that but she liked it. The ache between her legs transcending when she felt his hot breath on her neck.

Liv didn't know how to react to what was happening and how fast it was happening, so she turned in Fitz's arms and decided to wake him up.

"Fitz." She took ahold of his face. "Wake up."

His hazy response was to kiss her. And she held the kiss for a minute but quickly pulled back. "FITZ STOP."

The demand was clear enough to snap him out of his trance.

"What are we doing?"

"Shit Liv, I'm sorry.. I didn't mean to--"

"It's okay. Nothing happened..yet."

"I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable by acting like a horny teenager. That was wrong and--"

"We're dating Fitz."

"That doesn't make it right. Especially without your consent. I don't want you to think that I'm taking advantage of y--"

Again Liv chose to interject, "Hey! Will you stop?" She asked with a giggle. "I know you. I know you'd never take advantage of me. Okay?"

"Okay."

"So..did you dream about me?" Her eyebrow wiggle let him know she was teasing him.

"Wow okay, please embarrass me some more."

Olivia let out a good laugh before going in for an affectionate kiss.

"Did I.. um-- Did, I scare you?" Fitz asked looking deep into her eyes; their faces inches apart.

"No Fitz, you didn't. I always feel safe around you." Olivia blushed before admitting, "Besides. . I think I liked it."

They stared into each others eyes trying to calculate their next move.

"I don't want us to do anything if you're not ready." Fitz assured her, fighting the urge to give in to the moment.

She kissed him again. A lot more fiercely than before.

"Livvie.." His voice was thick with arousal. "I want you to be sure. I want us both to be on the same page."

"I'm ready Fitz." She lets out a shaky breath, "Just a little nervous."

"There's no rush Livvie." The words leaving his mouth didn't add up with their body language as they seemed to be drawing each other closer and closer.

Olivia sat up and slowly removed her top. "Just.. take it slow with me, okay?" There she was giving him her permission.

"Whatever you want baby."

So she climbed on top of him, straddling his waist. Fitz grabbed hold of Liv's hips and sat up to meet her with a honest smile. "You're beautiful Olivia Pope."

Liv blushed and cupped his face, bringing him in for a kiss which quickly turned into a heated make out session.

In between their passionate tongue duel, Fitz's hands roamed Olivia's body and effortlessly unclipped her bra.

With a predatory growl he flipped them over and laid her down on her back.

"We're going to take this slow, okay?" Fitz spoke into her ear while caressing her nipples with his thumbs. And all Liv could do was nod. His touch made her weak.

Fitz worked on removing the rest of her clothes with sensual precision. Leaving only one item; her panties, which showed her moistening flesh. He was sat on his knees in-between her openly spread legs which left him salivating.

His arousal and hunger for her intensified.

"May I?" Fitz asked with a naughty smirk.

Olivia bit her lip, "Yes." She replied in a whisper.

Now, Olivia was used to oral sex. She'd like to think that she was experienced on that front. However, this was about to be a whole new experience with Fitz dipping his face between her thighs. She couldn't know what to expect but she felt all kinds of tingles on her skin when his hot breath made contact with her inner thigh.

Fitz left a small kiss on her left thigh before removing her soaked panties; discarding it next to the bed.

Olivia was in a trance as she intently watched his every move.

Fitz gripped her ankles and brought both her feet to his lips; kissing the soles of her feet. From there he lifted her legs even further, straightening them upright to leave a trail of soft kisses down on each marvelously sculptured leg.

Olivia's core was throbbing from his touch.

As Fitz's hands slid down to her calves, he folded her legs over her body which put her round ass on full exposure. Olivia let out a shaky breath followed by an intense moan when he sucked on the soft flesh of her butt cheeks before he took a kinky little nibble with his teeth.

As a dancer Olivia was able to stretch her body in unbelievable ways and this allowed Fitz to bring her legs back down and spread them wide open. His mouth was watering at the view in front of him. He just had to taste her.

And so he did.

His tongue dragged through Liv's slick center, making her body tremble. It was then that Olivia realised that Fitz had a pretty strong tongue. And he proved it over and over by moving it in and out of her.

"Fuck you taste so damn good." He groaned as he devoured her.

Olivia was gripping the sheets as Fitz feasted off of her. Soon she yelped loudly and ended up squirting right before a strong orgasm hit her.

Her body still trembled from the aftermath of that release while Fitz removed his clothes.

"Oh wow." Olivia was still trying to catch her breath. "I never knew I could do that."

"Squirt?" Fitz asked while licking his lips and sure enough that made Olivia blush.

"Yeah. It felt.. wow."

"I guess I'm doing something right then." He winked at her.

Olivia smiled innocently and pulled him down for a proper kiss. "You're doing a lot of things right."

They continue to make out until Liv started tugging on the hem of his briefs.

Suddenly Fitz was hit by a very realistic realization. "Shit, we don't have any protection."

"Top drawer." Liv replied while kissing his jawline.

Fitz was surprised. "You went and got some--"

"No. Abby thought it would be hilarious to gift me with months worth of supply. She figured I should stay ready for whenever you're here."

"She's a good friend to have in your life." He said as they both laughed.

Watching Fitz roll the condom over his engorged member, the pulse between her legs returned. Simultaneously her heartbeat increased as she mentally prepared herself for the experience she was about to have.

Fitz settled himself comfortably on the bed, pulling Olivia on top of him as they kissed. "Are you okay?" He whispered out, pecking the corner of her mouth. And Olivia gave him the sweetest smile in return which assured him that she was relaxed and ready.

He gently flipped them over and kept his gaze on Liv's beautiful face as he entered her. She gasped. Eyes rolling to the back of her head as Fitz filled her up.

Both Fitz and Olivia felt a sense of wonder as he moved in and out of her.

Olivia tried not to give in; to hold back a little longer and enjoy Fitz' length thrusting in and out of her. But the pleasure was overwhelming so she dug her nails into his back and let go; her walls opened up for him as her hips bucked violently.

After reaching powerful orgasms together Liv's heavy-lidded eyes stared into his smokey blue orbs.

"Hi." Fitz said with an awfully happy smile, causing Olivia to giggle.

"Hi."

"You're amazing. That was, incredible."

Liv snuggled as close to him as she could. "It was."

"Why don't we take a shower, put some fresh sheets on this bed and get some sleep." He suggested with a little chuckle.

She traced her finger over the shell of his ear. "Sounds like a good idea."

Once in the shower they were tempted with another round of passionate lovemaking. The way the water dripped down Liv's body gave Fitz a rock hard erection.

But Olivia had other ideas; giving him a handjob so good until he came right into her hands.

They finally made it into a freshly made up bed, cuddled up with their legs intertwined.

"Goodnight Livvie."

"Goodnight Fitz."

* * *

**_Two Months Later_**

"Hi baby." Fitz greeted Liv with a chaste kiss. "How was your day?"

"Fine."

He noticed the lack of enthusiasm in her voice. "Are you okay?"

"We need to talk Fitz." Seeing his face change in an instant she added on, "and no, I'm not about to break up with you."

"But I can tell that whatever it is, that it must be pretty serious."

Olivia stroked her palms over her face, took a deep breath, then looked Fitz straight in his eyes. "Well yeah, it's.." Another deep breath in and out. "...I guess it is pretty serious. All that's been going through my mind for these past two days was how am I going to tell you--"

"Tell me what?" He asked, clearly worried.

"That I-- I'm pregnant, Fitz."

His eyes grew wide as he's stunned into silence. And it scared her a little bit, so she began reasoning with him.

"I know how you feel about becoming a father and I know that this is probably the last thing you want. But Fitz, you also know how I feel about having kids and before we talk about this any further I just want you to know that I really want this baby."

He walked past Olivia to go and sit down on the couch. "When did you find out?" An unreadable expression on his face.

"Two days ago."

"I thought we were being safe." He said more to himself than to her.

"The night of Abby's party. We--"

When she mentioned the party it dawned on him. "Oh.. yeah."

"How do you feel about this?"

"I don't uhh. . I really don't know."

"Are you, upset?" Olivia asked hesitantly.

"I just-- This is-- Ugh." Fitz got up and started pacing.

"I get it Fitz, really I do."

"What do you get Liv? Hm? Because the last time I checked you're the one who wanted to have a baby more than ever, not me. So I don't think you really get it. This is not just a mistake this is life changing. Well maybe not for you since you're getting what you've wanted all along."

Olivia scowled at him. "Excuse me??"

"I didn't mean--"

Olivia raised her palm in order to silence him. "You're upset. Maybe I should leave you alone for a little while."

"That's not going to change the fact that you're pregnant and that I'm going to be a-- A fff.." He couldn't even say the word.

"A father. Fitz I know it's scary but--"

"I don't want to have kids Olivia. You knew that."

"And you knew how strongly I felt about having a child, so what's your point?"

"This is just so messed up."

"Well maybe our whole relationship was just one big mess from the start."

His eyes quickly turned soft. "Don't say that. I do love you and having you as my girlfriend brought me the most joy I've ever experienced in my life. Us, together, that was never a mistake."

"Then why can't you be okay with me being pregnant? We can do this together Fitz. We can raise this baby together. Me and you."

"I don't believe I can. I'm not cut out to be a parent Olivia. So much goes into being a parent and I just-- I don't see myself as a father."

"So that's it?" Olivia said, getting snippy.

"Now you're mad at me? I'm just telling you how I feel okay?"

Olivia's eyebrows knit together in a frown. "Are you blaming me for getting pregnant Fitz?"

"I'm not doing that."

"Newsflash! This!", She gestured at her not-so-pregnant looking belly, "..Is both our doing. We were both careless. Not one or the other is to blame here, okay!? We had unprotected sex! You knocked me up! I'm pregnant! And I'm keeping the damn baby!"

"Whether I like it or not?"

They were both acting out of frustration.

Disgusted, Olivia swallowed some air. "You'd actually want me to get an abortion?"

"That's not what I'm saying. It just looks like at this point it's either me or the baby."

"That's according to you. I literally just told you that I want us to make this work and raise this baby together. "

"How do I go from not having the slightest desire to wanting a child, to actually raising one?"

"I don't know." Liv shrugged. "Maybe the same way that I went from having absolutely zero interest in men to being in a whole relationship with you. But you know what, this has been a lot for both of us and I think you need some time alone, to think.. So maybe you should go before we say anything else that we'd regret." She said, trying to keep it together. And she did, but just barely, which is how Fitz noticed.

He grabbed her arm gently to stop her from walking away. "I'm really sorry. This is just so difficult for me and with it being so soon and unexpected makes everything so much more scarier. I never intended to hurt your feelings Olivia but please you've got to at least try and understand where I'm coming from. I can not be a father."

"Honestly I don't understand where you're coming from because you've never really delved into why you feel the way you do about not wanting kids."

"It's just not for me." He simply stated.

"So you're going to be my boyfriend but not the father of my child even though this is your baby? How does that even work?"

"I--"

"I think I'm tired. You should really leave Fitz."

"Hey.." He pulled her back once more, "I _do _love you."

She knew that for a fact but hearing him say those words so earnestly, now, during such a trying time for them as a couple.. It meant a lot to her. It made her believe that there was still hope.

"I love you too." She replied, glossy-eyed.

* * *

Four weeks later after minimal contact which only consisted of short texts, quick phonecalls and an impromptu lunch date every now and then, Fitz showed up at Olivia's apartment.

"Oh, it's you." Abby sounded almost angry.

"I need to talk to Olivia. Is she here?"

Abby rolled her eyes as she turned on her heels. "Here to tell her to get an abortion?" She mumbled loud enough for him to hear.

"Abby I really don't have time for your petty shit right now. I get that you love her and that you want to protect her but that doesn't give you the right to involve yourself in our personal issues, okay?"

Abby laughed bitterly. "You know what I find really funny is that--"

"Abby. Please don't." Olivia said, breaking up the possible fight that was about to go down between the two people she loved the most.

"Let me head out before I involve myself any further in your personal issues." She replied with a roll of her eyes.

"Abbyy..."

"If you need me, call me."

"Hey!"

"What Olivia!?"

"Don't get an attitude with me Whelan." Liv said, closing the distance between them and pulling her best friend into a hug. "I love you, but I can take care of myself. Okay?"

"I didn't mean to get snippy with you and I know that you're perfectly capable of looking out for yourself but Liv. ." Abby sighed, "I can't not worry about my sister. "

"I know Abby." They hugged each other just a little tighter before letting go.

With Abby gone Olivia turned her attention to Fitz. "Stop staring at my belly. I'm not showing yet but I'm definitely still pregnant."

"I wasn't-- Sorry."

"Hi."

"Hi."

"I think you and Abby should stay out of each other's way." Olivia stated seriously.

"I actually agree with you on that."

"What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to talk to you."

"And you actually showed up rather than to text or call? I thought that was our only form of communication lately since your job is keeping you so busy." Sarcasm evident in her tone.

Fitz tilted his head slightly, "Liv please. Can we talk?"

"Sure." Olivia sighed, leading the way towards the couch.

"So I have to go to Denver for a few days." He said looking at her.

"Oh. ."

"It's for work. Dad needs my help over there to smooth out some issues at the company."

"I see."

"So I just wanted to tell you in person that I'm leaving tonight."

Hearing that his departure would be so soon made her frown, "Tonight??"

"He literally called me up just this morning so there was really no heads up."

"And this is for a few days?"

"Well yes, until we're able to resolve the issue."

"Meaning a few days could be up to a month or so depending on the situation."

"It shouldn't take that long. Maybe about two weeks max."

Olivia scratched the corner of her mouth, "Is it really a work thing, Fitz?"

"Of course Liv. Do you think I'm lying to you?"

"No it's just.. I guess I just assumed that you'd be leaving because u needed time away from me."

"Liv I don't--"

She cut him off, "Fitz this is literally the first time we're talking to each other in person for over two weeks. Do you blame me for being a little sceptical about you having to go to Denver now all of a sudden?"

"I promise you I'm going there to help Dad out then I'll be back."

"And when you're back, what then? What happens with us? Will you accept this baby?"

He couldn't answer her. So Olivia got up off the couch. "Maybe you should stay out there for more than a few days after all.."

"Livvie. ."

"No I'm serious. I think you should stay there for a while after the job is done, get your head straight and when you're come back, hopefully you'll know what you really want. And don't see this as me pressuring you in any way or giving you an ultimatum. All I want is some certainty because there _will_ be a baby in a few months time and I just want us to get out of this weird space we're in right now and move forward with our lives; however that may be." She said sadly, touching her belly. "You should probably go and get ready for your flight."

"I don't know what to say to you right now and that's probably frustrating to you but I don't want you to be mad at me Olivia."

"I'm not mad at you Fitz. It's just unfortunate that we've ended up in this situation. We were always complete opposites in every sense huh." A dry chuckle accompanying her words.

"I don't want to give up on us."

"Neither do I."

Fitz got up on his feet and took hold of Olivia's hands in his. He then pressed a tender kiss on her forehead, "I love you."

"I love you too. Before you go, can we just.. Can we just have one minute?" Her voice cracked and Fitz wrapped her safely in his arms.

"One minute."


	7. Chapter 6

"What?" Fitz asked, breaking the silence when he noticed his father staring at him. They were currently in Douglas Grant's office, perusing through some documents.

"Is everything alright with you?"

"Sure."

"Your mother is really bothered about you staying at an hotel instead of our home. And I told her she shouldn't make a big deal of it since you're a grown man but Fitz, you've been in town for two days already and you haven't even stopped by the house to see her. I mean what's up with that?"

"It's nothing Dad. As you know we've been kept on our toes and I just want to find a solution before the company gets dragged into an unnecessary legal battle."

"We have all hands on deck son. I sure don't expect you to dedicate all of your time to this. Besides, we're getting on top of the situation. Look, I don't know what's going on with you but please just go and see your mother because I'm running out of excuses as to why you won't come to the house."

"I will."

"Today?"

"Yes Dad, today."

"Good. She'll be very happy to see you."

After a few errands and some phonecalls later, Fitz finally showed up at his childhood home.

"Fitz!"

"Hi Mom." He gave her an apologetic smile as he leaned in for a hug.

"Boy why the hell have you been ignoring me??"

Fitz laughed when he received a smack on his arm. "Hey! Take it easy woman. Who says I've been ignoring you?"

"Since when do you stay at a hotel when you're in town? You better not be up to no good."

"I should've stopped by earlier, I'm sorry. It's just..this thing at work has been taking up a lot of my time and attention."

"That still doesn't explain why you couldn't just stay over here at the house. And how are things with Olivia? How is she?"

"Liv is fine, everything's fine. Do you have anything to eat? I'm kinda hungry."

Margaret eyed her son suspiciously but didn't say anything...yet. "There's salad?"

"Sure why not."

"So what's new? Anything exciting happening around here?" Fitz asked chowing down his food.

"Not really. Unless you want me to tell you all about the drama I hear from the ladies at the salon."

"Please don't." He replied, chuckling.

"Soo I talked to Olivia last week."

Fitz pushed the empty bowl in front of him aside, " You did?" He asked surprised.

"Yes. I just randomly called her to hear how she was doing. We had a lovely little chat."

"Anything interesting you talked about?"

"No, just a normal conversation. I really like her."

"More than you like me I bet."

"All I know is that if Olivia was in town she wouldn't have ignored me for two days straight unlike someone else."

"Wow." The two share a nice laugh.

"So, can we talk about what's bugging you Fitz?" Margaret quickly became serious. " And don't tell me it's nothing."

"I don't think it's something you can help me with anyway so. ."

"Try me."

"Mom.."

"Did you and Olivia break-up?"

"No. What did you guys really talk about? What did she say to you?"

"It's what she didn't say. You two usually lit up at the mention of the other's name but something's off."

"Well we're just going through something right now that's all."

"And you didn't work it out with her before you came here?"

"It's not that easy Mom."

"You should never choose your work over the love of your life."

"It's not even like that, okay. Plus I don't even think Liv wants to look at me right now anyway."

"And that obviously bothers you which is why you're shutting down. This is why you chose to stay at a hotel and why you're burying yourself in work."

"The company--"

Margaret was quick to interject, "I know what is going on with the company and as far as I'm concerned it's being resolved."

"Okay fine, " Fitz sighed, "I'll tell you what's going on. Liv is pregnant."

With the lack of emotion in his voice Margaret didn't know whether to be excited or worried. "Wow, that's grea- Oh." She then remembered, "You don't want kids."

"I _do _love her."

"But?"

"I don't know.."

"You've always jokingly mentioned not wanting to get married one day and not wanting to have kids and I genuinely never knew just how much you meant it when you said it. Now don't get me wrong, there's absolutely nothing wrong with your personal decision. But for me who have raised you, I just don't understand it. I mean I can't help but to wonder, did my marriage to your father and our parenting have any influence on your decision?"

"I don't think it did. I admire your marriage and how well you and Dad navigate life together. But I just don't think that I'd make a good enough husband or father."

"And why's that?"

He drummed his fingers on the countertop. "I mean I don't know. That's just how I feel."

"You don't know? Fitzgerald, you literally have a baby on the way, you need to figure this out. You need to be honest with yourself in order to be honest with Olivia because she deserves at least that."

"Well what do you want me to say. I just told you that's how I feel."

"But why do you feel like you just can't do it even though you love Olivia."

"It's just-- Kids. Being a father."

"You're scared."

Fitz didn't say anything but the expression on his face told her she was right.

"Well son, for what it's worth, I don't believe any person is ever fully prepared for marriage or parenthood but you learn as you go and you commit yourself to giving it your best."

"I get what you're saying and for me it's just-- I'm scared of a marriage not working and I'm afraid of bringing a child into this scary world and not being able to protect them or failing to be a good parent. And what really scares me is any possibility of losing the people I truly love."

"Is it safe for me to assume that this is why you've never gotten into any serious relationships, because you don't want to get your heart broken?"

"I know it sounds crazy but I just don't want to go through all that. I was never that vulnerable guy who allowed people in or to open up to them. If I had any problems I'd just go to a bar and have a drink or bury myself in work. But then Liv came into my life and I didn't even recognize how different I was with her because it was so natural. She was just this breath of fresh air and I could just tell her about everything that was on my mind. And I enjoyed it. I loved having someone to talk to so easily. I always felt like there was no reason for me to be vulnerable but her presence in my life changed that."

"And then you fell in love with her."

"I did." He smiled. "I love her so much."

"Love is something else isn't it? You know, I've heard somewhere something along the lines of when you give someone your heart, you also hand them the power to destroy you or rebuild you. What power do you think you gave her?"

"She definitely made me a better man." Fitz let out a loud sigh, "I don't want to lose her Mom."

"I want to tell you to get it together and stop being a coward but I don't want to get involved into your business even though technically I'm already involved since that baby is my first grandchild and I'm actually excited that I will get to experience being a grandma. But you're a grown man Fitz so the only advice I can give to you right now is; if you do make the decision to stay in your relationship and accept the baby, please do so because you genuinely want to be a father for that child because the worst thing you could possibly do is to stay because of your love for Olivia but then fail to love that baby and build a bond. That would ruin you, Olivia and that innocent child. So please son, think about this. I really don't want to make you feel bad but if you're seriously considering walking away then honestly you've wasted Olivia's time."

"Trust me I already feel bad."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Why couldn't you just talk to Olivia about all of this?"

Fitz's eyes looked sad. "Because I've already hurt her enough with my reluctance. She's acting like she's okay and that this isn't all getting to her but I know she's hurting and I hate that. I hate that I'm making her feel that way when she's supposed to be feeling joy and happiness being pregnant because she's always wanted that. I-- She deserves better than a man who can't take responsibility."

"You're too caught up in your head. Just break it down and think about what your life will be like with whatever decision you make."

At that moment Fitz's phone beeped. "Looks like I should be on my way. They need me at the office." He said looking at the text.

"Okay. When do you go back home?"

"Well they still need me here.."

"Fitz." His mother's tone was warning.

"Mom I'm--"

"Being ridiculous." She said.

"I've gotta go. Love you."

* * *

"Abby tell me again why I agreed to go out with you tonight?"

"Ohh no missy, you're not about to bail out on me. Besides, you're already dressed and you look amazing by the way."

"Aw thanks Abby. But I've also had a really long day and I'd like to just relax in a nice hot bath."

"No, what you need is some fun and cheerfulness because you've been a little down lately."

"I'm fine Abby." She replied unconvincingly.

"We really should've been on our way already."

"At least promise me we'll get back by ten."

"Okay fine. Any other requests?" Abby asked sarcastically to which Olivia responded with laughter.

An unexpected knock on the door had them both looking confused.

"Who could that be?"

Liv shrugged. "Let me go and check."

Much to her surprise she found Fitz standing on the other side. "Oh? You're back?"

"Hi."

"Liv who's at the door?" Abby asked walking up to her. "Great. There goes our plans for the evening." She muttered under her breath when she saw her best friend's boyfriend.

"Sorry, I guess I should've called first." He apologized, looking at Olivia.

"I didn't think you'd be back this early."

"Everything went smoothly that side so they kind of don't need me there anymore."

"I see. Well um, we were actually on our way out."

Abby sighed. As much as she hated Fitz's guts at the moment, she knew the two of them desperately needed to talk so she decided to cancel her plans with Olivia. "It's okay Liv. We can make it another time."

"Abby you were really looking forward to tonight. Are you sure?"

_Olivia wasn't ready to talk to him. She could only see one outcome of a possible conversation and she wasn't ready for it. She wasn't ready for them to be over._

Abby picked up on the desperation in Liv's voice and the two shared a knowing look. "I mean I did make a reservation for us and it would kinda suck to cancel now." It wasn't a lie. Abby was going to surprise Olivia with a late dinner at her favourite fine dining restaurant.

"In that case we should make sure that we get there in time." Liv glanced over at Fitz, "Sorry but--"

"I understand." He smiled faintly. "Well, let me get out of here, I don't want to hold you guys up. You look beautiful by the way."

"Thank you."

"Enjoy your evening Livvie." Fitz stepped forward to wrap her in a hug and Olivia buried her face in the crook of his neck. She really missed him. She missed them together and it hurt more than she wanted it to.

The rest of the night played out great, thanks to Abby. She made sure to keep Olivia laughing throughout the night and for those few hours to just forget about her worries.

"I didn't know I could have that much fun without a little alcohol in me." Abby admitted humourously. "Just don't expect me to stay on this no drinking wave throughout your pregnancy though because I'm not that good of a friend."

"Thanks for tonight Abby. I really enjoyed myself. It was nice to just live a little."

"You're welcome Liv. Now let's get moving, I promised I'd get you home by ten."

"You're adorable."

"Oh shut up."

* * *

Fitz made his way into the living room after having slept in a little later than usual since he had the day off from work. He trekked to the kitchen, grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and got settled on the stool with his phone in his hand which he had not checked since the night before.

"Ten missed calls from Mr. Pope??" He frowned thinking what it could be about. Then it dawned on him that maybe Liv told her father about the pregnancy. But why would he call him so persistently at 10:45pm if that was the case.

Eventually Fitz decided to call Howard Pope back.

_"Fitz! I've been trying to get ahold of you since last night. I called your work this morning but they told me you took the day off."_

"Sorry about that. I went to bed kinda early last night. I assume that the reason you were looking for me was important?"

"I take it you haven't received the news yet."

"What news?" Curiosity got the better of him.

"Olivia's in the hospital."

"WHAT!? How? Why? What happened!?" Fitz was pacing now.

"Car accident with Abby. From what I was told a drunken driver crashed into them. I'm still at the hospital right now."

"Howard, is she okay? Please tell me she's okay."

"She's okay." Howard sounded slightly emotional.

"Thank God. Which hospital is she at? I'll be there soon."

Fitz arrived at the hospital in record time. He was thankful when he saw Olivia's father in the waiting room.

"Hi, can I go and see her?"

"Unfortunately not. She's due for a check-up any minute now."

"Oh, okay." It was only then that Fitz looked around the room and noticed Abby's family, realizing that he completely forgot to ask about her condition. "How's Abby doing?"

"She's doing okay. I just think they were both really lucky. It could've been so much worse."

"Have you been here since last night?"

"Yes. I wasn't going to leave my baby girl here on her own."

"I should've been here." Regret all over his face.

"Oh, no son, I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I'm just saying.. Livia is all that I have. She's my baby girl and just the thought of-If she had- I don't think I would have been able to live a life without both my girls." He said referring to the loss of his wife.

"I understand."

The two men kept a light conversation going until a nurse came and gave them the go-ahead to see Olivia. Fitz waited for Howard to make a move but the older man laid a gentle hand on his shoulder, "I'll give you two a moment alone. Go ahead."

"Thank you." Fitz said and hurriedly strode towards Liv's room.

When his eyes fell on her, relieved washed over him. He could finally breathe normally again. "Hi."

Olivia had a cut in her lip. Her body was bruised and she had a broken wrist. But she wasn't in any severe pain. "Hi." Her greeting filled with emotion.

Fitz sat at the foot of the bed. "I'm so sorry. I should've been here earlier. How do you feel?"

"Like I've been hit by a car." A little humour never killed nobody.

"Too soon Liv." Fitz said, not laughing. " You scared the hell out of me. Do you remember anything about the accident?"

"It really felt like the other car just came out of nowhere. Abby didn't even have time to swing out or anything. We just saw the bright lights coming closer and then felt the hit."

"Thank God you're okay. And Abby too."

"Yeah, it could've.." She swallowed back the lump forming in her throat. ".. we're all fine and that's all that matters."

Fitz rested a hand on her leg as he examined her face. "The.. " He cleared his throat and Liv could sense slight hesitance. "The baby..?"

"The baby is okay and even though I'm not that far along I will need to take it easy for a while. Doctor's orders."

He nodded. "Okay."

"Okay." She was almost mocking him. It just frustrated her that she still didn't know where things stood between them and whether or not they will be moving forward together.

"What?" He asked picking up on her tone.

"Nothing Fitz." Olivia rested her head down on the pillows and closed her eyes while letting out a sigh. "Nothing."

"Have you eaten anything yet?"

"Yes. They don't let their patients starve in here you know."

"I'm just making sure that you're okay Liv. So you're being discharged today right?"

"Mhm. My dad insisted that I stay with him until I've made a full recovery."

"Oh.."

She opened her eyes to look at him. "I didn't wanted to at first but then I thought about what if this accident turned out differently and what it would've been like for him if I didn't make it, you know. I think he just needs me close by for reassurance.. To know that I'm fine and I'm not going anywhere."

"Yeah, no of course. When I spoke to him I could tell that he was still a little shaken up."

"I've kept on trying to tell him that I'm okay and that it's not that serious but I guess he expected the worst when he received the news."

"Can I just.. Do you mind if I just wait here until you're ready to go?"

"I might just take a nap but sure, I guess you can stay."

"Hey Liv?"

"What?"

"Have you.. Did you tell your dad about.."

"Not yet. Can we talk once I'm home and we'll rested?"

"Okay."

Silence filled the room and soon Olivia fell into a slumber with Fitz moving to sit on the chair across from her bed.

* * *

Days later Fitz went to visit Liv at her father's house.

"Hi. I brought popcorn."

"You didn't have to Fitz." Liv stepped aside to let him in.

"I wanted to. Is your dad home?"

"No, he went to his bookclub meeting. You can leave the bag in the kitchen."

"So what have you been doing all day?" He asked, joining her in the living room.

"Not much. I've just been texting Harrison and Quinn back and forth to keep up with what's going on at the studio. I wanted to go out for a walk this afternoon but my nausea has been extra today, so much so that it really drained my energy." She said switching her gaze from the tv to his face, "..but I'm sure you didn't want to hear all that." They still haven't talked about their future. About the baby.

"Do you think you'd be okay for that walk now?"

"I--"

"We can just go around the block. But if you're not up for it then it's fine."

Olivia looked at Fitz with confused eyes. "This is weird."

"Weird?"

"Yes. What are we doing Fitz? I figured we'd have a genuine talk when you came back from your trip but. . You come to see me everyday but we just don't talk, you always deflect and I'm trying-" She released a sigh of frustration, "I just don't know anymore."

"Okay. Let's talk."

"And just like that you're ready to talk?"

"Like you said, I've been deflecting, I'll admit that. So let's talk."

"We cannot be in a relationship if you can't accept this child hence why I said that this, whatever it is that we're doing, is weird." Liv stated bluntly.

"I told my mom that you're pregnant."

"Okay and? What does that have to do with our situation? What is it that you want Fitz because this is getting really exhausting."

He scooted closer to her on the couch, "I want this. I really do. I want us. And I'm sorry that it took me far too long to realize that. But I want to be honest with you Livvie; I never envisioned myself as a father or a husband, you know that. We've always bickered about it when we were still just friends and it would end in a joke of some sort. But I have learned that sometimes different people and situations can bring out a different side of you, and you have definitely made me look at life differently. Yes, when you told me you were pregnant I wasn't too happy but that was because I didn't know that I wanted it. I was so clouded by my own insecurities that I wasn't thinking. I didn't ever think that I would want that life.. I didn't think that I wanted anything.. at least not until I fell in love with you. You came into my life giving me a chance at happiness that I might never have gotten with someone else. Your love and your presence in my life, it definitely changed me into a better man. But I still have things to figure out. If I want us to work and if we're going to be in this together then I have work to do, a lot of work, in order to become the partner you deserve and a father to that baby. I love you Olivia and I'm sorry for putting you through so much. But I promise you.. I want to be present in every moment with you and this baby and I want to enjoy that."

Olivia was trying to choke back the tears but failed. It was tears of relief and love and happiness. "I was so worried. Every day, I would wonder if it's the end for us because I felt like you were pulling away from me. And I wasn't ready to let you go, not yet."

Fitz pulled Olivia into his lap and brushed away her tears. "I'm so sorry baby."

"Are you really sure this is what you want though? I mean, I don't want you to say all of that just because you might feel like you'd be letting me down."

"Hey.." His thumb stroked her cheek, "..I want this. Period. It just so happens to be that I'm also kinda madly in love with you." The elated grin on her face made Fitz unbelievably happy.

"So what did your mom say when you told her?"

"Oh she was happy. She would've burst from excitement if I wasn't so miserable."

"You were soo miserable." She laughed, running her fingers through his hair. "You're lucky I love you, Abby on the other was damn near close to punching you in the face."

"I should probably apologize to her as well. She was just looking out for you."

"Yeah, I'm really glad to have her in my life."

"How is she doing by the way?"

"She's doing great; also just resting so that her injuries can heal."

"So, when do you think you will be moving back to your apartment?"

"Okay I'm not gonna lie, I kinda like living with my dad. It has been nice to just sit and talk for hours but also, being here has made me realize just how alone he actually is and I don't like that. There's no need for him to grow old all on his own, I mean what if he gets sick? Who's going to take care of him? I would want to be there for him but I can't be with him at all times."

"Soo you're staying, _for now_?"

"I don't know.."

"It looks like he keeps himself busy though."

"He does but at the end of the day what does he come home to? I'm here now but what if I go back to my own place then it's just him in this house."

Fitz left a soft kiss on her lips. "Have you talked to him about your concerns?"

"Sort of..but he just laughs it off and tells me to relax."

"Well are you going to tell him that you might be thinking of moving in with him?"

"Is it stupid that I'm actually considering to move in here?"

"Not at all. You care about him."

"I just need to know that he's okay at all times, that's all."

"Funny how you're here because he was worried and wanted to take care of you but now the roles are reversed."

Liv giggled and molded her body perfectly into Fitz's frame, breathing him in.

"I've missed holding you in my arms." He confessed and she hummed in agreement. "And I'm really sorry that I took away the joy of your first pregnancy. This should've been one of the most happiest times in your life and I ruined that for you."

"You didn't ruin it, not exactly. When it sunk in that I was going to be a mother..I was genuinely happy. But can you promise me not to shut down like that again? What hurt me the most was how you wouldn't communicate with me and be honest with me when we were always able to talk to each other about everything."

"I promise." He pressed a kiss on her forehead.


End file.
